The One Where Chandler Finally Experiments
by Jana
Summary: This is a Joey-Chandler slash piece. In other words, this story involves homosexuality. If such a lifestyle offends you, please do not read this story! -Chandler is sexually harassed at work, by a guy, which brings on an interesting turn of events.
1. 1

**The One Where Chandler Finally Experiments**

By: Jana~ 

*

**CHAPTER ONE**

*

--Chandler stormed through the door, obviously upset, slamming his briefcase on the counter before grabbing a beer from the fridge.

Hitting mute on the TV first, Joey turned the swivel recliner around, facing his fuming friend. "Rough day?"

"The worst!" Chandler exclaimed, loosening his tie, then twisting the cap off his bottle.

"Uh-oh," Joey muttered, asking, "What happened?"

Averting his eyes as if embarrassed, Chandler sighed before he announced, "I was sexually harassed!"

Joey smiled, nodding in appreciation. "Nice."

"No, no," Chandler corrected, "**Not** nice!"

"Why?" Joey asked, confused. "Was she a dog?"

Chandler downed half his beer in three gulps, then kicked at the ground, hesitant to explain. It was so humiliating to him, he wasn't sure he wanted any of his friends to know. "No," he answered reluctantly.

"Then," Joey scowled as he tried to follow, "What?"

There was a moment where he considered lying, but Chandler found himself blurting out the truth instead. "**She** was a **he!"**

"Oh," Joey said with a nod, "So, you were…" He trailed off, unsure of what to say.

"Humiliated!" Chandler snapped, completing his unfinished sentence. "I mean, the guy just, **grabbed my ****ass!"**

"Why did he do that?" Joey questioned. "Did he **say** why?"

Chandler groaned before answering. "He said he thought we had 'a moment'."

Brows met as Joey's eyes narrowed. "What kind of moment?"

With a sharp exhale of breath, Chandler explained with an obvious irritation in his tone, "He thought I was gay! He thought I was interested in him, cause I asked him if he had seen my stapler! I swear," he huffed, "What **is it with the people in my office?"**

Joey just shrugged, standing to get a beer.

"Seriously, Joe," Chandler continued. "What is it about me? Why do people just assume I'm gay?!"

"I don't know," Joey returned, handing Chandler a second beer, moving around to the other side of the counter. "You- you have this-"

"Quality, I know," Chandler sighed. "I'm **so** sick of hearing that! I've heard it all my life! But I'm not!"

"I know," Joey assured him.

"I'm not gay!" Chandler continued his ranting. "I've never even had, you know, a… homosexual experience!" He sharply whispered the last two words, for what reason, he wasn't sure, since they were alone in the apartment.

Joey nearly choked on his beer, coughing and sputtering before responding to his friend's admission. "What?"

"You know," Chandler explained, "How some people experiment, like, in college?" Joey nodded. "I never even did **that**!"

"Really?" Joey asked, seemingly surprised.

Taking note of Joey's tone, Chandler asked, "Yeah, why?"

"No reason," Joey answered quickly, giving a subtle shrug of his shoulders. "It's just," he added softly, "I have."

A shocked expression accompanied a speechless silence as Chandler stared back at his friend. The revelation more than surprised him.

"You- you- you… have?" he finally asked, stuttering as he found his voice, and Joey nodded in response. "Uh, when?"

"I was a senior in high school," Joey shared, "And I was hanging out with a friend. We got to talkin about sex and stuff, and one thing led to another. And we ended up… experimenting."

"But," Chandler sputtered, "You- you're not gay!"

A smirk pulled at Joey's mouth. "I know that. People who experiment aren't necessarily gay."

"Well, yeah, ok, maybe, but-"

"I was curious," Joey interrupted. "I wanted to see what it was all about. You've never been curious?"

"Well," Chandler admitted hesitantly, "Sure, but I never acted on it!"

"Because you didn't want to?" Joey asked, "Or because you never had the opportunity?"

Chandler scoffed. "I attended an all-boys school for years. Of course I had opportunity."

"Then, why didn't you?"

"Because," Chandler shot back, "I'm not gay!"

Joey shook his head. "Neither am I! Neither are a lot of people who get curious and mess around!"

Chandler's head hung low as he confided, "All my life," he said with an inner pain that was obvious, "People just assumed, because of my **quality**, because of my dad— It was hard enough breaking away from that assumption. It was hard enough getting women to date me. I didn't want to add to the whispered rumors!"

"So," Joey asked cautiously, "The only reason you **didn't** experiment is because you were afraid people would think you were gay?"

Chandler shrugged. "People already **thought** it. I didn't want to give them reason to **believe** it."

"But, Chandler, stuff like that can be kept secret, ya'know?"

Shaking his head in disagreement, he said, "Stuff like that gets out. People talk."

"You didn't know anyone you trusted enough to keep it just between the two of you?"

"It's not as simple as that," Chandler muttered.

"It can be!" Joey insisted. "Let me ask you, if you **had** known someone that was willing, and that would have kept it a secret, would you have done it?"

After a moment's thought, Chandler sighed. He couldn't believe he was having this conversation. He couldn't believe he was about to admit this. "Maybe," he near-whispered.

"Do you trust **me?" Joey asked, wincing slightly as he awaited his friend's answer.**

Chandler's eyes widened as he realized what Joey was suggesting. "What- what are you saying?"

By Chandler's reaction, Joey could tell his friend knew very well what he was talking about. What he was suggesting. "I think you know," he said carefully.

"But," Chandler announced nervously, "We're not gay!"

Joey rolled his eyes. "The offer is out there," he told him, tossing his empty beer bottle into the trash. "The ball is in your court."

He left a stunned Chandler alone as he went to his room.

***

--There was no way he could sleep, not after the conversation he'd had earlier. Sure, he tried. He curled up in bed, in his t-shirt and boxers, blanket wrapped tight around him, but sleep was impossible. His brain wouldn't shut down, replaying Joey's words over and over again, refusing to give him a moment's peace from having to think about it.

Chandler didn't know how he was going to face his friend in the morning. If he was this uncomfortable, just after having a conversation, he could only imagine how awkward things would be between them if he actually took him up on his offer.

It was out of the question. Sex with friends was always a bad idea, anyway. Besides, he wasn't gay. He never imagined Joey was gay, either.

Actually, he would probably be considered bi, with as many women as Joey has slept with, Chandler thought to himself. Then he wondered, had he been with other guys, besides the one he admitted to? All of the sudden, Joey, his best friend, was a mystery to him. What else didn't he know about the man he'd shared an apartment with for years?

***

--Staring up at his ceiling, Joey was starting to regret confiding in Chandler. He seemed really freaked out, about his admission, over his offer; there was no way he could take it back, it was already out there. Already threatening to destroy their friendship.

Chandler was his best friend, he couldn't imagine **not** having him in his life. Would he want to end their friendship because of this? Would he ask him to move out, or find another place to live?

Joey considered jumping up and running into Chandler's room to talk to him about it, but then another idea came to him. Pretend it never happened.

"When morning comes," he told himself, "Just act as if nothing is different."

He didn't consider the possibility that Chandler would bring it up, or what he would say if he did. Ignoring it seemed like the easiest solution, so that's what he decided to do.

**TO BE CONTINUED**…

This is my first and possibly **only** slash fic. As a straight woman, I don't know all the inner workings and emotions of a homosexual man, or men, or **women**, for that matter, so I don't know how comfortable I would be doing this again. That being said, this idea just screamed at me, begging to be let out, so like all my stories, that's why I'm writing it. Cause it was in me, begging to get out.

I know slash fics don't usually get many reviews, but I have the 'allow anonymous reviews' button clicked, so you can review under anonymity, if you want. Just let me know if I should keep going or not. If there isn't much desire for me to keep going, I'll go ahead and stop and pull it.

Ok, so, to sum it up… please review!


	2. 2

The One Where Chandler Finally Experiments

By: Jana~

Chapter Two

**

--The sounds were unmistakable. Joey never could fumble about the kitchen without making noise, banging things around and slamming cupboard doors just a little too hard.

Chandler peeked out of his room, the bottom half of the cut door easy to open without drawing attention. He couldn't be certain from his vantage point **what, but he could tell Joey was cooking. If going by the smell wafting through the apartment, it was eggs a la Joey.**

With as little fanfare as possible, Chandler exited his room, avoiding eye contact as he headed briskly for the bathroom.

"When you come out," Joey called to him, "I have breakfast for you."

Chandler stared back at the man in the mirror; he **looked** like a man who hadn't slept a wink. "Ok, thanks," he called back, his eyes staying focused on his reflection.

He hoped he sounded as casual as Joey sounded. He hoped he could get through breakfast without doing or saying something stupid. And he hoped above all else, that Joey **wouldn't** bring up the conversation from the night before.

***

--Eating in absolute silence, Chandler tried hard not to be conspicuous as he stole glances of his friend, his mind replaying 'the offer' over and over. He could literally feel his body tensing as the minutes ticked by without words being exchanged, and the longer it went on, the tenser Chandler became.

"You ok, man?" Joey asked suddenly. "You look… tense."

"How could you make an offer like that?!" Chandler blurted out anxiously. "We've known each other for **years**! How come you never told me you were gay?! How come I'm just now finding out about this?!"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Joey said with his hands help up to stop Chandler's rambling questions. "I'm actually **not** gay," he explained. "Some might call it bi, but it's really not even **that, since I was only with the one guy that one time. And I made the offer cause… I don't know," he shrugged, "Cause you seemed really upset, and I thought maybe, if you had 'the experience', you wouldn't be so wigged out about people thinking you were gay or whatever."**

"How would sleeping with a guy help me when people say I'm gay?! If anything, it would just confuse me!"

"If it confuses you, then maybe you **are** gay. Or bi," Joey added.

"No, no, no," Chandler announced firmly, "I'm **not** gay!"

"What's the big deal?" Joey asked casually, rinsing his plate in the sink.

"The big deal is, I'm not gay!"

Joey rolled his eyes, "So you keep saying. Look, all I'm saying is, if you **aren't gay, having sex with a guy won't ****turn you gay. And if after you have sex with a guy, you're confused about your sexual preference, then you very well **might** be gay."**

Chandler's intensity mellowed slightly, and he looked away as he asked, "Were you confused, afterwards?"

"Not really," he replied. "It was fun, and interesting, but I pretty much have never been attracted to any guys. Just women," he added.

"Pretty much?" Chandler asked, requesting clarification.

Joey didn't answer right away. He waited until his silence brought Chandler's gaze back to him. "I've only had an attraction to one other guy, but I have never acted on my feelings with him, since he's straight."

Chandler swallowed hard. "Uh- um- who? Would I, uh, know him?"

Joey nodded. "You know him."

He could feel the anxiety rising as adrenalin coursed through his veins. "I don't wanna know **who, do I?"**

"I'm guessing not," Joey answered with a soft tone of voice.

"I- I- I- gotta get out of here," Chandler stammered, his eyes darting around the room for something to look at besides his friend and roommate.

"You're not dressed," Joey pointed out. "You're still in your boxers and robe."

"I'll buy clothes while I'm out," Chandler returned absently, then headed for the door.

Joey moved quickly, physically standing in his friend's way, preventing him from leaving. "Chandler, calm down," he instructed. "You're all, hyperventalitating."

Chandler stared back at him for a moment. "You mean, hyperventilating?"

Joey scowled, "Isn't that what I said?"

He couldn't help the smile that crossed his face. "No, it's not. What you said isn't even a word."

Joey smiled in return, relieved to see an ounce of calm in Chandler. "Well, you know me," he joked, "Dumb as a post."

Chandler shook his head, "You know I don't think that."

"I know **you don't," Joey replied, then gestured at the twin recliners. "Can we just, sit and talk for a minute? Please?"**

Reluctantly, Chandler nodded, walking cautiously to his designated Lazy-Boy, sitting on the edge in slow motion.

"Look, I'm not saying I'm in love, ok? I **really** like women. A lot. But, I am attracted to… **this guy**. I have wondered, what it would be like, to **be with him, but I'm not necessarily looking to have some serious relationship with him. I'm just… **curious**. I thought it might be fun. I'm already really close with, ****this guy, in other ways. We hang together, spend time together, go to games together and stuff. We're, really close. And, I just, wanted to share ****that with him as well as pizza and hockey tickets."**

"Joey," Chandler sighed, "I know who you're talking about."

Joey smiled sheepishly, "I just didn't want to freak you out, by saying 'you', ya'know?" Chandler nodded. "Nothing has to happen, ok? The offer is out there, but, if it's too weird for you, then we can pretend it was never discussed."

"It's too late for that," Chandler informed, his voice barely above a whisper.

"What are you saying?" Joey asked worriedly, but Chandler only looked down at his socked feet and shook his head.

Without a moment's thought, before Chandler could even register what was happening, Joey was off his recliner and on his knees in front of him. He looked up at the sign of movement, to be met by Joey's lips being pressed softly against his.

He startled at the contact, but Joey raked his fingers through Chandler's hair and held him steady, refusing to allow him to pull away. He wasn't so much fighting him as he was shocked, and reacting the only way he knew how.

Joey could feel Chandler's tension easing, though he really wasn't returning his affection. Still, it was a start.

Slowly, he broke the kiss, his hand leaving Chandler's hair to rest on the arm of the chair.

"I don't know why this bothers you so much," Joey stated gently, staring back into Chandler's amazing blue eyes. "Maybe it's cause of your dad, or because you were teased in school. Or because people keep saying you have a quality. I just don't know, but I **do** know this," he announced. "You are my friend, and whatever you want, I'm ok with it. You want to forget this conversation ever happened, **done**. You want to… **experiment** with me, you just say the word. But, please don't stop hanging with me because of this, ok? I couldn't take it, not having you as my best friend."

"I would never stop being your best friend, Joe," Chandler told him, "I just- I just don't know right now. My brain feels like it's on overload."

Joey chuckled, "Now you know what it feels like to be me!" Chandler smiled at his friend's attempt at humor. "Look," Joey added seriously, "You have some stuff to think about, so I'm gonna go for a bit, and leave you alone to do that. When I come back, you let me know what you want to do, k? And, just so you know, we don't have to do anything **now**. We can wait weeks, or months, or whatever you want. Just, let me know if you want to forget about it, or possibly pursue it, and we'll go from there."

Chandler just stared at his friend, at a loss for words, and Joey smiled as he patted his knee. "I'll be back in a couple hours or so," he informed, then stood. "Want me to bring back pizza?" Weakly, Chandler nodded, watching as his friend grabbed his coat from the hook and walked out the door.

I wonder what an embolism feels like, Chandler thought to himself, then stood on shaky legs and headed for his room to think.

**TO BE CONTINUED**…

Hey, according to one of my reviews, I'm a sicko! Gotta wonder, what part of that chapter was sick, exactly? Is it the homosexual 'flavor' of the story that is 'sick' to you, or some specific content? Are you a homophobe?

And I'm assuming, when you said 'After reading this, I want to watch the show anymore', what you **actually** meant was, you **don't** want to watch the show anymore. Um, you **do** realize, don't you, I'm not an **actual** writer for the show, and this story **isn't** a script from it? It's a **FANFICTION** story. A fiction story, written by a fan. In this instance, **me**. This storyline will **not** be appearing on the show, so there's no need to stop watching it.

To those who left **actual** reviews, thank you! I was really debating whether or not I would post this story, or continue it, cause it is just **so not** something I know much of anything about, but since there are at least a few people who would like to see me continue, I will.

Please review, but if you just want to tell me how 'sick' I am, maybe you oughta just email me instead. Cause, the review section is for **reviews**, not your personal opinions of **me**, or homosexuality.

Thank you, and MTLBYAKY

My email is: JanaOnWheels@aol.com


	3. 3

The One Where Chandler Finally Experiments

By: Jana~

***

Chapter Three 

***

--Joey entered the apartment, noticing immediately that Chandler wasn't in the livingroom. Since the door to his room was shut, he easily deduced that he must be in there.

Setting the pizzas on the counter, he called out to him, and as he waited for an answer, he shrugged out of his coat and hung it on the hook.

When the bedroom door swung open, Chandler appeared in the doorway. "You're back." It was a simple statement, showing that he was still at a loss for how to respond to the recent turn of events.

"With pizza," Joey added, then grabbed them each a beer from the fridge.

Slowly, Chandler walked toward the counter, taking a seat on the livingroom-side barstool. Noting how unperturbed the man across from him seemed, Chandler reached over and grabbed a piece of pizza from the box, thanking Joey in a whisper when he opened his bottle for him.

"So," Joey finally broached the subject, "How was your time alone?"

Chandler knew what he was asking, but he wasn't sure he had an answer yet. Part of him **was curious, but part of him was scared over what might come of their friendship, if they ****were to 'experiment'. Another part of him, deep down, was concerned that if he **did** do this, that he would learn he was gay after all. Like his father.**

He didn't want to face that. Not yet. Not like this.

But if not now, then when? And if not like this, then like what?

Chandler shrugged when he sensed his friend's eyes boring into him, his gaze remaining on his slice of pizza. "It was… ok."

"Have you come to any decisions?"

"Not really," Chandler answered. It was as if the air around them was so thick, it was suffocating him. How could Joey not feel it?

"You wanna, talk it out?" Joey asked, offering his help.

"I'm not sure," Chandler replied. "Maybe."

The answer obviously wasn't a definite 'no'; he was struggling too hard with the decision.

"Well," Joey began, "Why don't you tell me the reasons you **don't want to do this."**

"For starters," Chandler returned quickly, "It could ruin our friendship."

"How so?"

"Whenever friends sleep together, problems arise! Fights break out! Friendships often end when that line is crossed."

"They don't always," Joey countered.

"Look at Ross and Rachel!" Chandler exclaimed, using their friends as an example.

"Look at me and Pheebs!" Joey shot back, shocking Chandler. "And Ross and Rachel are friends **now!"**

"You and Pheebs…?"

Joey nodded. "It was a while ago, after I first moved in, and she was still moving her stuff out of Monica's."

Chandler shook his head, stunned. "And you guys just, went on to being friends? No big deal?"

"Pretty much. We knew it was just a one-night thing."

"And what do you suppose it would be with me?"

Joey smiled, Chandler's words a positive sign he was actually considering the offer. "It can be whatever you want it to be," he assured him. "One night, several nights, short-term, long-term… whatever you want."

"What about **you? What do ****you want?"**

"Promise you won't freak?" Joey asked, and Chandler nodded in response, giving his word. "If it's something you would be open to, I would **like** to see if maybe, we're compatible. You know, as a couple."

Looking down at the pizza, picking at the crust, he asked, "So, you would want to date me?"

"Only if that's something you want too. I'm ok with it if it's not."

"But, what if we do this, and I determine I'm **not** gay, but you figure out you're in love with me or something?"

"I'm willing to take that risk," Joey replied.

"Maybe I'm not," Chandler shot back.

"Or, maybe you're just using that as an excuse **not** to do it! Cause you're afraid that if you **do**, you might discover you're actually gay, and you don't want to be."

"I **like women!" Chandler announced, frustrated.**

"So do **I!" Joey exclaimed. "I also like ****you!"**

Chandler sighed. "I like you too, Joe, I'm just- I'm not so sure doing this is such a good idea. I don't want to hurt you, if I end up **not** feeling the same as you do, and I just don't know if I'm ready to deal with it if I **do** feel the same as you do."

"That's what it comes down to, huh?" Joey challenged him. "You're afraid."

"Yes," Chandler announced, "I am! Are you happy now?! I'm afraid!"

"Of what?"

Sighing deeply, he gathered his thoughts before answering. How could he explain it, when he didn't fully understand it himself? "I don't know," he eventually muttered, his eyes downcast.

"Is it because of your dad?"

After several moments, he shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe. When he left, all I ever heard was how horrible it was. That he was gay. That he waited so long to admit it. That he took off to Vegas to be in a drag show. I guess, on some level, though I don't have a problem with homosexuals, I always figured that for **me to be one, would be unacceptable."**

"Have you ever been attracted to guys?"

"I've never allowed myself to think of any guy in that way."

"Are you seriously attracted to women?"

"Yes. I'm not just convincing myself of that, if **that's** what you're thinking."

"So, if you **were bi, would you hate yourself?" Chandler just shrugged in response. "Do you hate ****me, cause I told you **I'm** bi?"**

"Of course not," he stated firmly.

"The kiss, this morning," Joey asked, "Did it excite you at all? Or were you repulsed by it?"

It took several agonizing seconds before Chandler finally answered. "I wasn't repulsed by it. I was surprised, though."

"I sensed that," Joey said with a nod. "Ok, now let's go into some of the reasons why you **would consider doing this."**

"I'm curious," he admitted. "When you first suggested it, I know I freaked out, but, after you left this morning, I got to thinking about it, and I think…" He trailed off, trying to find the words to describe his feelings.

"I think, maybe," he continued, "It wasn't **just** fear, but, also, a little… excitement."

Joey dropped his third slice of pizza, rubbed his hands briskly together to rid them of the crumbs, then moved slowly to Chandler's side of the counter. He could see Chandler tense, and he offered him a small smile to reassure him.

"I meant it when I said I wasn't going to force myself on you. Nothing will happen that **you don't want to happen." Gently, he slid one hand up Chandler's arm to rest on his shoulder, then stepped further to place his other hand on Chandler's other shoulder, standing in back of him. "First," he said quietly, "Let's work on this tension."**

As Joey began to massage his shoulders, Chandler could feel himself starting to relax. His hands were strong, but forgiving, and a sigh escaped without his consent as he found himself enjoying Joey's ministrations.

Leaning forward slightly, Joey whispered, "You're liking this."

His breath tickled his ear, and Chandler shuddered at the feelings that bombarded his senses.

"It's your call," Joey whispered, "But do you want to come with me to my room?"

**TO BE CONTINUED**…

Ok, I know some of you like the story, and some of you hate it. Some of you want me to change courses and turn it into a C&M piece, and others are very opposed to that. I'm not going to give away the direction of the story, but I can tell by the reviews and emails, that there will be some very happy people, and some very not-so-happy people by the end of this.

Ok, so, you know the drill. Reviews make my world go round, so, let's see 'em!

MTLBYAKY


	4. 4

**The One Where Chandler Finally Experiments**

By: Jana~

CHAPTER FOUR 

****

--Chandler's head was spinning. He didn't think it was possible, but he found himself actually enjoying a man's touch. Not just any man, but his best friend. Still, he wasn't sure he was ready for the next step.

"I don't know what to do," Chandler answered in a whisper, his heart and mind in conflict with one another.

"It's not so different than what you would do to yourself," Joey told him, "But if you want, **I** can do all the work this time."

Chandler spun around, and Joey's hands left his shoulders as he did. "That's not what I meant, Joe." With a sigh, he explained, "I **meant**, I don't know if I'm ready to take this step just yet."

"But," Joey asked, "You **are** considering taking the step, aren't you?"

Chandler nodded. "Yeah. I am. I just- I need more time. Time to, I don't know, adjust, maybe?"

"Or," Joey suggested, "Time to chicken out?"

"Can't you understand how hard this is for me?!" Chandler shot at him. "This would change **everything I ever knew about myself! It's- it's too huge."**

"I **do understand all that! But, I also know **you**! If you have too much time to think, you'll talk yourself out of it!"**

"So, what, then, all that talk about how we can wait weeks or months, it was all just crap?!"

"No! If you need time, that's fine! I'm just saying, don't use that as an excuse to talk yourself out of it!"

"I wasn't planning on it, but if you're gonna be like this, then maybe I **do need to rethink this!" With that, Chandler stormed out the door of the apartment, taking the stairs two steps at a time in an effort to flee quicker.**

Joey considered going after him, but decided to wait it out instead. Chandler obviously had some major issues, and maybe time alone would help him deal with them.

Grabbing another slice of pizza and what was left of his beer, he plopped down on the recliner and started channel surfing.

***

--Chandler stormed through the door, catching Joey's attention immediately.

"I'm **not gay!" he announced, and Joey exhaled sharply as he stood from off his recliner.**

"Oh my God! Why don't you just tattoo that on your forehead or something!" Joey snapped, then clicked off the TV and threw the remote on the chair he had just vacated. "You know what, the offer is off the table!" he told him. "Just forget I ever suggested it! You're just, too freaked out about it! You've got **way too many issues. Just, forget it," he repeated, waving his hands dismissively as he turned and walked into his room.**

Chandler stared after him, unsure of how to feel. Was he serious? Was the offer really off the table? He didn't know what to think of that. Should he be relieved, because the pressure was now off? Should he feel bad, that he upset his friend? Should he feel disappointed, because the opportunity was gone?

With a stunned silence, Chandler's eyes scanned the apartment abstractedly, before he slowly wandered to his room.

***

--Days went by, and they had hardly said two words to one-another. Chandler tried to apologize once, but Joey just put his hand up to stop him, then walked away. Chandler didn't try again after that.

They avoided each other for the most part, and the rest of their friends were starting to notice that something was amiss. That's when Phoebe approached Chandler.

"Hey, Chandler," Phoebe greeted him as she sat beside him on the couch in the center of Central Perk.

"Hey, Pheebs," he muttered back, his nose buried in some computer magazine.

"What's going on with you and Joey?" she asked, skipping the small talk and going straight for the subject that brought her out in search of him.

He tensed, the magazine remaining in place, but the words in front of him blurring as he no longer tried to focus on them. "What do you mean?"

"The way you act around each other. The vibe you're giving off. Something is weird between the two of you," she announced assuredly.

"We're ok," he lied, "We just had a little fight."

"What about?" she asked.

"Nothing," he answered. "Pizza or toothbrushes or something. I don't really remember."

"You're lying," she stated as fact. 

"No I'm not," he returned, as if offended.

"Yes, you are," she retorted. "I can see it in your aura."

"You can see **what in my aura?" he asked, skeptical.**

"Auras can show when people are lying. It's just invisible to most."

Chandler shook his head and sighed. "If you say so."

"Just tell me what's going on," she requested firmly. "I'm worried about you guys."

"Why?" he asked, scowling, his slight irritation at her nosiness making way for slight curiosity. "Why would you be worried?"

"Because," she told him, "Something is breaking the two of you apart, and it's not right. In fact," she added, "It's very wrong."

"You're not making any sense," he complained, trying to continue his veil of indifference.

"What did you fight about?" she asked again, pointedly.

He sighed before looking around them, to be sure no one was within earshot; he couldn't believe he was about to talk to her about this. "Joey told me he's bi, and he offered to…" He looked around them once again before continuing. "He offered to, **be with me, if I was interested in, 'experimenting'."**

Phoebe smiled. "Oh, yay! He finally got up the courage to ask you! That's so great!"

"Wait a minute, wait a minute," Chandler said as he threw his magazine down on the coffee table, turning to face her better. "You **knew** about this?"

"Well, yeah," she admitted easily. "Shortly after he moved in… well, that day, actually, he told me he was bi, and that he thought you might be as well. And that he thought you were cute. We've talked about it a few times since," she continued, "But he asked me to keep it a secret. That the more he got to know you, the more he figured you would just wig out on him if he were to say something. I figured he would **never** say anything."

He just stared back at her, the scowl he wore an indication of the shock and confusion that was bombarding his mind.

"I take it that's what happened?" she inquired, surmising the answer by his reaction to her information. "You wigged on him?"

"I don't know what to think about all this!" he admitted. "I'm not gay! I know I'm not, but, I am kinda curious. And I really like Joe, and I know he would, you know," he whispered, blushing, "Be careful. I just- I'm not sure our friendship could survive it. I mean, would it be so awkward, that we can't share an apartment anymore? If he feels something for me, and I don't feel anything for him, in that way, would it hurt him so bad that he started to hate me or something?"

"Have you spoken to him about all this?"

He shrugged. "A little, yeah, but then we ended up fighting, and he took the 'offer' off the table."

"The offer?"

"Yeah. This all started because some jerk at my office grabbed my ass, cause he thought I was gay. I told Joey about it, and mentioned that I had **never been with a guy in that way. Not even while in college, just to experiment or whatever. Then, he offered to be my, experimentation buddy."**

"He wants more than that," she confided in him.

"I gathered that," he said with a nod. "He hinted at that during one of our conversations."

"But, you know what?" she asked rhetorically. "He loves you. And if he can't have you as a boyfriend, he would still be your best friend, believe me."

"I don't know what to do," he lamented, his face in his hands.

"Why are you making this out to be like torture?" she asked him. "What's the worst that'll happen? What do **you** think is gonna happen, if you do this?"

"I might lose him as a friend," he replied, but she immediately shook her head no.

"That won't happen. He cares too much for you. What else?"

"I'll hurt him, cause I don't feel the same as he does."

"He's willing to take the risk. He knows what his heart can handle. What else?"

Chandler shrugged, his eyes finding the lint on his pants of the utmost interest.

"Do you think, if you do this, that you will **turn** gay?"

He looked up at her, surprised. "How do you **do** that?"

She smiled. "It's a gift. But," she added seriously, "That **is** something you're concerned about, isn't it?"

"In a way," he admitted. "And I know in my logical brain that I can't be **turned gay, but, I can't stop myself from thinking about it that way."**

"And, so what if you do **turn gay**? What would be so bad about that?"

Again, he shrugged, "Nothing, I guess."

"Do you think **we'll think less of you, if you discover you **are** gay?"**

"Well, no. I know you guys would be ok with it."

"Are you worried about your mom, and what she might think?"

"That's probably what Freud would say, huh?" he joked, and Phoebe smiled along with him. "I don't get why I feel like this, Pheebs," he answered seriously, "I just know that I do. Does it come from my dad and mom, and the issues they had when they divorced?" he asked. "Maybe. Probably. But, I don't know **exactly what it is, I just know I'm freaked out about it."**

"So, let's say you sleep with him," she challenged him. "And let's say, you didn't care for it. What would happen then?"

"I don't know," he told her. "I would feel awkward about telling him that. I wouldn't want to hurt his feelings, but I would pretty much be forced to, cause if I said I liked it, he would expect that I would want to do it again."

"But, he's a big boy, Chandler. He can handle it. He's going to be expecting it as a possible answer anyway."

"I guess."

"Ok, so, reverse question. Let's say you do it, and you **like** it. What happens?"

"I don't know. We become a couple?"

"Does that bother you?"

"I don't know."

She laughed. "You don't know much." Off his glare, she stopped laughing and gestured for him to continue.

"It just all seems so complicated," he said with a heavy sigh. "If I like both men and women, who do I decide to **be** with? What about marriage? And kids? How does any of **that** work in to all this?"

"Gay couples adopt all the time. But, if you truly like women, then, maybe you and Joey could just date casually for a while, until the woman of your dreams comes along."

"I'm not so sure he would go for that."

"Ask him."

When Chandler realized where the conversation had headed, he looked up at Phoebe with a shocked expression. "Am I- am I really considering this?"

She smiled. "It sure sounds like it."

"Then, why do I **still feel so confused? And conflicted?"**

"Ok," she announced, "We're going to play a little game. I'm going to ask you a series of questions, and when you answer them, I want you to say the first thing that comes to your mind. Don't think too much about it, that ruins the honesty of it. Just quickly say the first answer that comes into your head, ok?"

He nodded in understanding. "Ok."

"Do you like your job?"

"No."

"Do you like your name?"

"No."

"Do you like hearing Ross' dinosaur stories?"

"No."

"Do you like Thanksgiving?"

"No."

"Do you want to sleep with Joey?"

**TO BE CONTINUED**…

Please review! Especially with this story, I need assurances that it's going well.

Thanks for all the great feedback and reviews, it's more appreciated than you might realize.

MTLBYAKY


	5. 5

The One Where Chandler Finally Experiments

By: Jana~

*****

**Chapter Five**

*****

--Chandler's heart rate elevated as he stood outside of his apartment, his hand at the ready to turn the knob, but his will reluctant to see the simple action through.

"Just, go in there and get it over with," he mumbled in a hushed tone to himself. "Just do it."

Taking a deep breath, he forced himself to open and walk through the door.

Empty.

Mumbling a negative comment, Chandler sighed as he pushed the door closed. He had mentally prepared himself for nothing.

"I don't know if I'll have the nerve later," he grumbled as he headed for his room, only to be startled within seconds of the complaint.

"Who are you talking to?" Joey asked as he walked out of his room, noticing it was just the two of them as he looked around.

It took several moments, but Chandler finally ended up admitting, "I was talking to myself."

"Oh," Joey muttered indifferently, heading back for his room.

"Wait," Chandler called out, taking a step back when Joey turned to face him.

"What?"

"I wanted to, talk to you, for a minute," Chandler haltingly requested.

"Why?" It was obvious by his tone that he was still upset.

"I- I wanted to apologize," Chandler told him, but Joey just rolled his eyes and stepped again towards his room. "I don't know why I'm like this," Chandler then blurted out, stopping Joey dead in his tracks.

Seeming slightly interested at that point, Joey gestured for him to continue.

"I don't know why I'm like this," Chandler repeated, "And I don't know what about this has me so freaked out, but, it **is** something I've always been curious about," he admitted. "Somewhere, deep inside, I wondered. Because of my dad, because of other people's assumptions…"

"I guess maybe it's because, **before**, it was safe to wonder, and **now**, it's a real possibility, ya'know? Before **now**," he continued. "Before knowing you, I just- I never felt comfortable enough with anyone I knew to- to test… to **see**… until…" 

Chandler purposefully trailed off, giving Joey the chance to fill in the blank, so to speak, or to respond.

"Until now," Joey stated with caution, reluctant to assume.

"Until now," Chandler repeated, nodding. "So," he asked after a moment, tucking his hands into his pockets, "Where do we go from here?"

"Well," Joey replied, "You still seem a bit on edge over the whole thing, so, maybe we should just, take it slow."

"Yeah," Chandler agreed.

"We should do something to take our minds off it for a while," Joey suggested. "We can play a little foosball, or watch the game. Whatever you want to do."

"Yeah," Chandler sighed, relieved. "Foosball is fine."

***

--It was a little awkward, but not as much as he expected it to be. The foosball game did its job, and so did the three beers he'd had, helping to put Chandler at ease about the situation to come.

"You sure you don't want to wait?" Joey asked, sitting beside Chandler on the couch. "You still seem… tense."

"I'm always like this," he returned, "Before…" He trailed off, shaking his head in embarrassment.

Surprised by the admission, Joey asked, "Always? Even with women?"

"Well, yeah, since I've never been with a guy, remember?"

"So, it's not just **me**, cause I'm a **guy? It's the, situation in general?"**

Chandler shrugged. "Yeah, I guess."

"Interesting," Joey muttered, and Chandler questioned the response. "It's just, you seem so confident in other areas, I wouldn't expect you to be so, **not confident, in **this** area."**

Frowning, Chandler asked, "Can we stop talking about it so much and, just, get on with it?"

"Oh, now, **that's hot," Joey quipped sarcastically, and Chandler let out a deep sigh.**

"I'm sorry, it's just, I'm-"

"I know," Joey interrupted, putting his hand on Chandler's far shoulder. "You're thinking about this too much. Just, relax. Let me lead," he instructed. "Fortunately, this is something I excel at," he bragged proudly.

Chandler would have liked to come back with a witty remark, but before he could, Joey's lips were on his.

Tension slowly ebbed, and Joey was suddenly aware that Chandler was returning his affections. Being the first to break the kiss, Joey pulled away and stared back into his friend's eyes. As Chandler's eyes drift open, he was met by Joey's gaze.

"Ok?" Joey asked, and Chandler nodded in response, smiling when Joey did.

With none of the previous anxiety that seemed to unsettle him, Chandler leaned in, initiating, for the first time, the kiss between them.

It was everything Joey had ever hoped for, and he pulled the man in his arms closer as he inched his hand up his thigh, coming to rest teasingly close to Chandler's groin.

Chandler's moan of pleasure was soft, and unintentional, and Joey pulled back to ask, "My room, or yours?"

"Yours," Chandler answered, standing shakily, allowing Joey to take his hand and lead the way.

Unbeknownst to them in that moment, everything Chandler ever knew about himself was about to change, and everything Joey ever wanted was about to be his.

*****

**THREE YEARS LATER**

--"I can't believe they're getting married," Rachel said as she sipped her coffee, comfortable on the ratty orange couch that was the focal point of the busy popular coffeehouse. "Two best friends, getting married. How often does that happen?" she asked, rhetorically.

"Not that often," Phoebe answered, even though Rachel wasn't expecting an answer.

"Exactly," Rachel exclaimed, appreciative of the backing. "Seems hard to believe, they've been together for three years."

"Has it been that long?" Ross asked.

"It probably seems like less, cause they kept it from us for so long," Rachel explained, and Ross nodded in agreement.

"I don't know why they did," he complained. "It's not like we weren't cool about it."

"Oh, yeah, you getting drunk at their coming out party and offering to sing showtunes with them, **that** was **real cool," Monica chided, lifting her attention from the notebook she carried, and everyone but Ross laughed.**

"Hey! It was big news!" he defended himself. "It's not every day you find out your two best friends are gay and in love! And Chandler was my college roommate!"

"What does **that have to do with anything?" Phoebe asked with a chuckle.**

"I just- I can't believe he didn't tell me! Even when people would assume it, he would deny it!"

"That's because he, himself was in denial. The more he said he wasn't, the more he defended that position, the further in denial he would sink," Phoebe said with surprising clarity and sense.

"You know what **I can't believe," Monica joined the conversation, "How **Phoebe** could've kept this news from us for so long!"**

"Yeah," Rachel chimed in, "That's right! She knew since London and never said anything to any of us!"

"Before that, actually," she confessed, adding, "And I promised I wouldn't tell anyone. The only reason **I** knew, was cause Chandler needed someone to talk to about…" She trailed off, hesitating to mention it again.

Monica rolled her eyes, "You can say it Pheebs. Everyone knows the fool I made of myself in London."

"Hello, children," Chandler greeted his friends, entering Central Perk with Joey, hand in hand. "What're we all talking about?"

Ross stood and gestured for Chandler and Joey to take his seat, the larger chair to the left of the couch, while he moved to take the small wood chair to the right.

"We were just about to relive what a fool I made of myself in London," Monica muttered bitterly, her attention back on the notebook she held.

"You didn't make a fool of yourself," Chandler sighed, sitting on the arm of the chair, allowing Joey to take the seat. "I told you that, countless times."

"You don't call getting drunk and throwing yourself at your gay friend foolish?" Monica asked. "Your gay friend, who is in a relationship with your **other friend?"**

"But, you didn't know that at the time," he reminded, placing his hand on her knee sympathetically.

"You know," Ross spoke up, "I never did hear the whole story there."

Monica glared at him, then gestured for Chandler to tell the story as she busied herself with her task contained within the pages in front of her.

Chandler wasn't so sure it was a good idea to talk about it, since Monica seemed upset, but when he went to say something along those lines, Monica assured him it was fine. That **she** was fine, so, he relented, starting the tale with the fight he'd had with Joey, shortly after they arrived at the hotel.

**TO BE CONTINUED**…

For whatever it's worth, to whoever cares, I don't feel guilty about writing or posting this story, nor do I feel the content is 'wrong' or 'sick'. My only concern with this story, is that I am misrepresenting a homosexual relationship, since I don't know from personal experience, the inner workings of one.

You (anyone, everyone) are entitled to your opinion, of course, but I'm just not sure what you are trying to accomplish by calling me 'sick', telling me my story is 'wrong', and/or asking me how can I **not** feel guilty.

The story is **clearly** described as Joey/Chandler slash, and if such a thing, in your eyes, is sick and wrong, then **don't read it**.

For those still with me, thank you for the reviews and support. I hope I don't disappoint you in future chapters.

MTLBYAKY


	6. 6

The One Where Chandler Finally Experiments

By: Jana~

Chapter Six 

******

**FLASHBACK – 2**½** YEARS EARLIER – LONDON, ENGLAND**

--"C'mon! Do something!" Joey whined, pointing the video camera at Chandler as they stood outside the hotel where they were staying.

"I am," Chandler replied, slight annoyance to his tone. "I'm ignoring you."

"Ok, fine!" Joey huffed, handing the camera over, "You man the camera while I check the map."

Producing a map from his backpack, he pulled it open to show that it was a map of London, with all the landmarks popping up, like in a child's pop-up book.

"Oh, what the hell is that?" Chandler asked, his irritation still unnoticed by Joey.

"It's London, baby!"

First turning the camera on and pointing it at himself, Chandler rolled his eyes, then clicked the camera off again.

"Alright," Joey muttered, "The hotel's here, so, we wanna go- No, wait," he scowled, turning the map another way. "We want to go-" He sighed, unable to get his bearings straight. "I know what I'm gonna have to do," he told Chandler. "I'm gonna have to go **into** the map."

Chandler groaned as Joey set the map on the ground, then stood in the middle of it. "If you see a little version of me in there, **kill it**!" he snipped, his exasperation finally catching Joey's attention.

"What is **with you?" Joey asked, still standing ****in the map.**

"You're **embarrassing me," Chandler whispered harshly as passersby walked past. "It's bad enough you're wearing that ****ridiculous hat…"**

"Chill out, Chandler," Joey returned with an easygoing smile. "We're on vacation!"

Chandler just stared back for a moment, then dropped his gaze several times to the map on the ground before returning it to Joey, silently requesting that he get off and pick up the map.

"Ya'know, if you're gonna be like this, maybe we should sightsee **alone," Joey barked, upset.**

"Maybe we should!" Chandler barked back.

"Fine, then," Joey huffed, holding his hand out, "Camera please."

"Why do **you automatically get the camera?"**

"Because, I plan to do fun stuff, and you're a bump on a log!"

"Fine!" Chandler snapped, thrusting the camera at him. "But don't expect me to put out tonight!"

As Chandler started to storm off, Joey called out, "Yeah, well, same here!" then snatched his map off the ground and stormed off in the opposite direction.

***

--Chandler paced worriedly, wondering where Joey could be, trying to decide if he should go look for him, or wait for him to return on his own.

Unaware of Chandler's stress, Joey wandered into the room without concern, stopping abruptly when he saw the look Chandler wore.

"Where have you been?" Chandler asked, and Joey shrugged.

"Out," he returned coolly, then pushed past to set his bag of souvenirs down.

"Look, Joe, I'm sorry I said you were embarrassing me. That really wasn't cool. And if it makes you feel any better," Chandler added, "I've had a really lousy day."

"Yeah, me too," Joey said in response, his eyes downcast. "Sightseeing alone isn't much fun, is it?"

"I wouldn't know," Chandler answered. "I stayed here all day."

Joey stepped to close the gap between them, but just as soon as he did, Monica entered.

"Hey, guys," she muttered, sounding down. "What's up?"

The two guys moved away from one-another, like two magnetic opposites repelling the other, trying to look and sound casual.

"Hey, Mon," Chandler said with an upnod. "What's the matter?"

"Oh, I just had the day from hell! First, I'm at the dress fitting, and Emily lets it slip that my mom actually told her she likes her **better** than me! Then, we go to see the chapel, and…"

As she rambled on, Chandler and Joey shared looks, apologizing without words, promising to make it up to one-another later, once alone.

Interrupting Monica in mid rant, Ross walked through the door, and all eyes in the room were on him instantly.

"What's up, Ross?" Joey asked, all of them aware of his obvious bad mood by how his jaw was set. His gaze seemed focused on Monica.

"I just spoke with Emily," he announced, his stare still on his sister. "Did you tell her that if the hall wasn't available, we should just postpone the wedding?"

The tension in the room elevated immediately, making Chandler and Joey fidget uncomfortably.

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom," Chandler announced, heading for it.

"Me too," Joey added, fast on Chandler's heels.

--"Whoa, intense," Joey whispered, glancing back at the door before facing Chandler. "Do you think the wedding is still on?"

Chandler shrugged. "I don't know."

The concerned look left Joey's face as he stepped closer to Chandler. "I'm sorry we fought."

Chandler smiled as Joey inched closer, kissing his lips softly.

"I am too," Chandler whispered. "Let's make the best of the time we have left here," he suggested, and Joey nodded as he leaned in for another kiss.

Hearing the sounds of crying from the other room, Chandler broke away and gestured towards the door that separated him and Joey from Ross and Monica.

"Is that Monica?" he asked, but Joey only shrugged in response. Deciding it **was Monica, he grabbed a tissue box and threw it out the door to Ross, closing it immediately after.**

"Why is she crying?" Joey asked, baffled.

"This has been hard on her," Chandler explained. "Ross getting married. It's what she's wanted, ever since she was little. And her mom giving her grief doesn't help the situation."

Hearing the sound of a door shutting, they both looked back at the bathroom door, listening for their friends' voices.

"I think they left," Chandler informed, then opened the door and peeked out to be sure.

Seeing that the coast was clear, the two men walked out into the main room.

"Oh," Joey suddenly announced, "I hope they don't think we went in there cause we were uncomfortable being out here!"

Chandler just stared back for a second, then said, "I hope they **do!"**

Scowling in confusion, Joey asked, "What?"

"We're not ready to tell everyone about us yet, remember?"

"No," Joey corrected, "**You're** not ready to tell everyone yet."

Chandler rolled his eyes. "We're not going to have this conversation **again, are we?"**

Glaring back at him, Joey snapped, "Why are you so ashamed of us?"

"I'm not ashamed of us, Joe. I'm just not ready to make such a significant announcement. You said you understood that." 

"I **did**," Joey returned, "In the beginning. It's been six months, Chandler! We hook up with the others, and we can't hold hands, or kiss, or show affection in any way. I have to make up girls I'm dating, so they don't suspect anything. I don't want to keep doing this!"

"What are you saying?" Chandler asked, fighting to keep the panic out of his voice. "That you want to break up with me?"

"No, Chandler, I don't want to break up with you," he answered, "But I want to come out to our friends."

Chandler shook his head. "I'm not ready to do that yet."

"You'll **never be ready," Joey snipped, grabbing his souvenir British flag hat, setting it atop his head before marching out the door.**

With a heavy sigh, Chandler dropped down on the edge of the mattress, leaning back on the bed and covering his face with his hands.

"What the hell is the matter with me?"

***

--Chandler tried to talk to Joey during the rehearsal dinner, but Joey just shut him out, reminding him that the people around them might suspect they were a couple, if they were seen together.

Dejected and frustrated, he started drinking, joining up with Monica, who was already well on her way to sloshed, outwardly upset about a comment made by one of her soon-to-be sister-in-law's guests.

--"Monica, he was drunk!" Chandler told her. "There's no way you look like Ross' mother!"

"Then why would he say it?" she challenged.

"Cause he's crazy! Earlier, he thanked me for my very moving performance in Titanic!"

"Maybe my mom is right," she sighed heavily. "Maybe I **am** gonna die alone."

"That is **so not true! I mean, who wouldn't want you?"**

"Oh please," she scoffed. "I'm a single thirty year old mother!"

Chandler just stared back at her for a moment, then snatched her scotch glass from her hand before she could tip it to her lips. "Ok," he scolded her, "That's enough alcohol for **you**."

***

--He tried to find Joey, to tell him that he was leaving the dinner to take Monica back to her hotel room, but he was nowhere to be found. The insecure side of him worried that he went off, in search of the horny bridesmaid that kept flirting with him, but his logical side fought to keep sane, to assure himself that their relationship was stronger than that.

After seeing Monica to her room, he headed for his own, dressing in his PJs right away due to a lack of something better to do. 

An hour later, in an effort to take his mind off the long-overdue Joey, Chandler dropped to the ground to do a few push-ups before bed. He had only done one of them when the knock at the door startled him.

Jumping up to answer it, he was hoping to see Joey on the other side, knocking because he forgot his key, but when he pulled it open, it was Monica that came into view instead.

"Hey, Mon." He fought to hide his disappointment.

"Hey," she said back, sipping on her drink. "Cute jammies. You're really livin it up here in London, eh?"

"Well," he defended himself with a smirk, "I wasn't exactly expecting company. Are you drinking again?" he asked as he pointed at the glass in her hand.

She pushed her way into the room, staggering slightly. "No, I never **stopped drinking. I'm drinking **still**!" She laughed at her little joke, then started sipping on her scotch again.**

"Is this because of what that guy said?" he asked, and she shrugged in response. "Monica, you just gotta let that go, ok? I mean, you were the most beautiful woman in the room tonight."

"Really?"

"Are you kidding? You're the most beautiful woman in most rooms."

Before he knew what was happening, Monica's lips were on his.

**TO BE CONTINUED**…

Please review! And remember… "You have to stop the Q-tip when there's resistance!"


	7. 7

The One Where Chandler Finally Experiments

By: Jana~

*******

**Chapter Seven**

*******

--Too shocked to react at first, he did nothing for several seconds, until he regained his head and pushed away from her.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," he exclaimed with wide eyes. "What's going on? You were just…" He trailed off, gesturing between the two of them anxiously, trying to find his words. "We- we don't **do** that."

"I know," she said with an intense stare, attempting to read him. "I just thought it would be fun." When she moved to kiss him again, he held up his hand to stop her.

"Monica, wait," he said, feeling horrible about what he was about to do. "I can't." He could see tears welling in her eyes, and he knew the extreme reaction was due to depression and too much alcohol. "Please, don't cry. I'm sorry," he apologized. "Monica, please believe me, it's **not** you. It's **me**."

"That's what they always say," she sniffled, "But everyone knows that's just code for, it **is you."**

"No, I'm serious," Chandler insisted, struggling for a way to explain himself without coming out of the closet, or outing Joey. "I'm- I'm seeing someone," he admitted carefully. "Back home. I haven't said anything about it, because, it's just going really well, and I didn't want to jinx it by talking about it too soon."

Monica wiped at her eyes, picking her drink up from where she had placed it.

"Monica," he whispered, taking the glass from her hand. "That's not going to help anything."

"It'll make me forget," she replied, struggling to keep her drink. He easily got it away from her, even with her effort.

"Forget what?"

"That I'm going to die alone. That my mom hates me. That you just turned me down."

"I'm not turning you down. Not really. If I wasn't in a relationship, you can bet money I would've said yes."

"Really?" she asked with a desperate quality, needing reassurance.

"Really," he said with a nod, gathering her into his arms. "You are an amazing woman, Monica, and eventually, some lucky guy is gonna see that and sweep you off your feet."

"You think so?"

"I know so," he stated with every confidence.

She sighed, taking comfort in her friend's embrace. "Thank you, Chandler," she muttered, "And I'm sorry for the position I put you in."

"Oh, that's ok," he forgave her easily, releasing her from her guilt. "You didn't know I was in a relationship."

"And speaking of," she said as she pulled back, "Tell me about her."

Chandler shifted uncomfortably. "I really can't. Not yet."

"Well, tell me how you met her, at least," she requested.

"Um," he stammered, stalling for time, his brain frantic to come up with a lie. "On the… way home from work. On the subway."

She could tell he was reluctant to share details, even in her inebriated state. "Ok," she muttered dejectedly, heading for the door.

He knew it was his avoidance of her inquiry that upset her, and he reached out and grasped her arm as she moved to leave.

"Mon, it's not that I don't want to tell you, it's just, it's not time."

"You're not just making it up?" she asked. "That you're in a relationship, cause you don't want to sleep with me?"

"I'm not making it up," he smiled. "Any man would have to be crazy or in a relationship, not to want to sleep with you."

"Or gay?" she added with a chuckle, causing Chandler to startle, but he quickly reigned it in, before Monica noticed.

He laughed along with her as he showed her to the door. "Ok, now, Mon, promise me you're going straight to your room to sleep. No more drinking, ok?"

"I promise," she assured him, then kissed his cheek before walking out the door. "Night, Chandler, and thanks."

"Night, Monica, and you're welcome."

***

--Checking his watch for the millionth time, he threw himself down on the mattress. The longer Joey stayed out, the more certain Chandler became that his boyfriend was cheating on him.

"Probably hooked up with that, Felicity chick," he mumbled to himself, sighing deeply. "I **could've gone ahead and slept with Monica," he muttered additionally, but winced at the thought. "I couldn't do that to her," he reprimanded himself, "**Or **Joey."**

He checked his watch again, then groaned at having done so, seeing that it was only 30 seconds later than the last time he'd looked.

"It's like torture," he grumbled, "And do I **really** deserve this?" he asked no one. "Is what I did **so terrible?"**

"You refuse to acknowledge your relationship. You hide who you really are," he reminded. "Yeah," he admonished, "It's **that** terrible."

Again he checked his watch, growling in frustration when he saw that it was only a minute later. Yanking it off his wrist, he slammed it angrily down onto the nightstand. Suddenly, an idea came to him.

"What time is it in the states," he wondered, then quickly did the math in his head. "I bet Phoebe is still up," he muttered at the empty room, then grabbed the phone and dialed for the operator.

*

--"Hey, Pheebs, it's Chandler," he said into the phone, smiling at how happy she seemed to hear from him.

"Hey! How's London?"

"Oh, well, it's good. Cold, but that's to be expected. Real pretty though, and-"

"Uh-oh," she interrupted, "What's wrong?"

"What makes you think something's wrong?" he asked, secretly pleased that she had sensed his mood.

She scoffed. "I might be at a disadvantage, because I'm pregnant and in another country from you, but I can still tell you're upset about something. My gift is substantial," she bragged, then asked again, "Now, what's wrong?"

He sighed, wanting **so** bad to confide in her. If anyone would understand, if anyone could help, it would be her. "Can you keep a secret?" he asked.

"Ooo, it's a secret?" she tittered, unable to hide the glee in her voice. "We haven't done the secret thing in a **long** time!"

"Is that a yes?"

"Yes," she answered. "It's a yes. What's up?"

He sighed, trying unsuccessfully to settle his nerves. "I think I just ruined the best thing that's ever happened to me."

"What do you mean?" she asked, confused.

Sighing again, he confessed, "Joey and I have been, **seeing** each other, for the past six months."

"Oh my God. Oh, yay!" she exclaimed. "That's so great!"

"Yeah, well, I think it's over now."

"What? Why?"

"Joey and I fought. He won't talk to me, and he's been gone for hours. I think he's cheating on me."

"Whoa, whoa," she interjected. "That's an extreme accusation. What are you basing it on? What did you fight about?"

"Well, earlier, we had a small fight, because he was embarrassing me. We spent the day apart, but we were all set to make up. Then, we had a new fight. Over the fact that I'm not ready to announce our relationship, and he apparently is."

"So, why do you think he's cheating on you? What happened after the fight?"

"He stormed out. He refused to talk to me at the rehearsal dinner, then, he made a big deal about the fact that this one bridesmaid was flirting with him."

"In what way did he do that? Was he flirting back?"

"Well, no," Chandler admitted. "But he kept throwing smug smiles in my direction."

"Are you guys exclusive? Or is it more of a casual thing?"

"It's supposed to be exclusive, but maybe Joey has changed his mind. Maybe he wants it to just be casual now."

"Has he said anything about wanting to downgrade it to casual?"

"No."

Phoebe nodded, not that he could see. "I hate to break it to you, Chandler, but it sounds to me like the problem lies with your fear of coming out of the closet, and all your weird commitment issues."

He sighed, running his hand over his face. "I don't want to lose him, Pheebs. How do I fix this?"

"Give him what he wants," she suggested. "He wants to announce publicly, his love for you. Let him."

"I'm not ready yet. He said he understood that."

"Then, find a compromise. Set a date for later that he can look forward to, for your coming out."

"What if he **did sleep with that Felicity chick? I don't know if I can forgive him. I mean, I was tempted tonight, too, but ****I didn't cheat on ****him!"**

"Tempted by who?"

"Monica! She's all depressed, and had **way** too much to drink, and she came to my room and threw herself at me!"

"Oh my God! What did you do? Did you let her down easy?"

"Of course! I just told her that I couldn't sleep with her, because I was in a relationship."

"She didn't as a million questions about **who** you were seeing?"

"No, she did, but I sidestepped them."

"Man," she huffed, "I miss **all** the fun!"

"Yeah," he snorted, "This is **tons** of fun."

"Well, maybe not for **you**," she said in response, getting serious again when she heard him groan. "Ok, Chandler, this is what you do. **Talk to him**! You guys need to sit down and have a long, serious discussion. About what you both want, where the relationship is going, where you want to be in a year, or five. Ask him if he hooked up. You'll be able to tell, he's a terrible liar. But be tactful."

"Ok, ok," he agreed. "You're right. I'll just, talk to him."

"Good!" she praised him.

"Thanks, Pheebs. For being there for me. Twice now."

She beamed. "You're welcome."

"Oh, and, this obviously goes without saying, but please don't tell the others. We'll tell them, when we're ready."

"No problem. Tell them what?" she added, and Chandler laughed.

"Thanks."

**TO BE CONTINUED**…

Please review! And remember… "Every cloud has a supple leather lining."


	8. 8

The One Where Chandler Finally Experiments

By: Jana~

Chapter Eight 

********

--Joey tiptoed into the dark room, being extra quiet so as not to wake Chandler. Chandler, however, was not asleep.

"Where have you been?" The bedside light was clicked on, immediately illuminating the man asking the question, as well as the man the question was asked of.

"Why do you care?" Joey shot back, shrugging out of his suit jacket and tossing it on the chair in the room.

"Just stop it, ok?" Chandler said firmly in response. "We need to talk," he added, his tone softer, patting at the bed he occupied as a request for Joey to join him.

"Here it comes," Joey muttered, then kicked off his shoes, in an almost angry way.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It's time to bail, right? It gets a little hard, a little challenging; we have a fight, so, it's time for you to run."

Not expecting the harsh words, Chandler asked, "Do you even **like** me anymore?" A scowl accompanied the question.

With a sigh, Joey sat on the edge of the bed, his expression hard to read, but his body language showed him to be remorseful for the seconds-old comment. "Of course I **like you, Chandler. I love you."**

"Why are you so **angry with me, over something you ****claimed to understand."**

"I told you, I **do understand, but, am I not allowed to have an opinion on the issue? Am I not allowed to express my opinion to my boyfriend?"**

"Of course you are."

"Have I outed us? Have I told anyone about our relationship?" he asked rhetorically. "No! I have kept the secret, lied to our friends to keep it, for **you! Because you're not ready to tell. And you want me to understand your side of this, but how about you take a second and try to understand **my** side of it!"**

"I **do understand your side of it, Joe, but, c'mon! You knew this about me. You knew I was having difficulties with this. I **told** you I was having difficulties with it."**

"I know, but, am I supposed to hide my feelings for you from our friends and family forever? We'll be living in some house, with the chick and the duck, and everyone in the neighborhood will whisper behind our backs, 'oh, yeah, those are the **bachelors', and then they'll wink. I don't want it to be like that, Chandler!"**

"What do you want it to be like, Joey? Where do you see this going?"

"Oh, God, it's **the talk."**

"The what?" Chandler asked. "What are you talking about?"

"It's what women do. You date for a while, then, they bring up **the talk."**

"Is that how you see me? Like a woman? Am I the woman in this relationship?"

"Would you calm down, Chandler. I don't see you as a woman. I'm just saying, that's what a woman would do. Ask where the relationship is going."

"So, it's a negative thing?" Chandler challenged. "Asking this question?"

"Not negative, just, not necessary."

"Why do you say that? Why isn't it necessary?"

"Because, if you were to just think about it for a minute, you would **know the answer to the question."**

Chandler stared back for a moment, then whispered, "But maybe, I want to hear you say it."

"What? You want to hear me say **what**, exactly?"

"That, this is it. That, down the line, you won't decide you'd rather be with some woman. Get married, and have a couple kids. Forget all about this chapter in your life."

"Is that what this is about? You want assurances that I'm not missing women?"

Chandler shrugged. "I guess. In part."

"I'm not missing women, Chandler."

"What about that Felicity person?" Chandler asked, trying not to sound accusatory. "She was pretty, and was all over you, trying to seduce you."

Joey sighed. "Just ask the question, Chandler."

"What question?"

"Look, if I'm gonna hafta answer it, you hafta at **least** ask it. I'm tired of making this easy on you! I'm tired of being your relationship tutor!"

With a scowl, Chandler blurted out, "Did you sleep with that bridesmaid?!"

"No," Joey answered instantly, "I didn't sleep with Felicity."

"Then, where have you been all night?"

"With Ross!" Joey snipped back. "All the fighting about the cost of the wedding, and trying to keep Emily from being stressed out, he ended up drinking too much. I took him to his room and stayed with him till he sobered up a little."

"Why didn't you come find me? I'm his best man, too!"

"I was busy. Ross is **tall**! And heavy when he's been drinking. I asked Felicity to tell you where I went."

"She probably couldn't find me," he admitted. "Monica got sloshed too, so I took her back to her room."

Joey couldn't help but chuckle. "Boy, those Gellers sure don't handle stress well."

"Nor can they hold their liquor," Chandler added, laughing as well.

The laughter and the smiles on their faces soon ebbed, and the seriousness of the previous discussion resurfaced.

"How can you think I'd cheat on you?" Joey asked, calm, but obviously unhappy about the accusation.

"We've never officially called this exclusive," Chandler reminded, pointing between the two of them. "I thought, maybe, you had decided to make it more of a casual thing."

"I wouldn't do that without telling you," Joey insisted, but Chandler just dropped his gaze to the bed they both sat on. Joey could tell he had something more to say. "What?"

"I've seen you date **lots** of women, all at the same time," Chandler stated cautiously. "It's not such a stretch to see that as a possibility with **us**."

Joey would've been offended, if it wasn't for the fact that Chandler had a point. "You wanna know why I slept with all those women? Do you want to know **why I never entered into a serious relationship, and just slept around?" Chandler looked up, but didn't answer with words; his expression did that for him.**

"I slept with all those women, because I was frustrated! And confused! Here I was, attracted to a man I could never share that with! Never tell how much I wanted to hold him, and kiss him. It wasn't fair to those women," he acknowledged guiltily, "And I know that, but, I didn't know how to deal with what I was feeling, so, I turned to casual sex for comfort. Some people use drugs, or they start drinking, or over-eating… sex was **my** vice."

"I'm not excusing it," he continued, "I'm just explaining it. I didn't sleep with dozens of women cause I **can't** commit, I slept with them cause I couldn't have a relationship with the **one** person I **would** consider committing to."

Chandler stared back at him, stunned. "How come you never told me this?"

"I didn't want to freak you out," he told him. "I didn't want you to feel overwhelmed and run away. You always seem like you're on the verge."

"Of what? Running away?" Chandler asked, and Joey nodded. "I'm not," he tried to assure him. "I have issues, but I love you too much to run away. I just- I need more time, to announce it to the others. Publicly."

Joey nodded slowly. "Ok. If you need more time, then, we'll stay in the closet for a while longer."

Reaching out, Chandler took Joey's hand, gaining his attention. "It won't be forever," he assured him, but Joey only nodded in response; Chandler could tell he was just tired of the arguing. "I'll make a deal with you," he suggested, and Joey eyed him curiously.

"What kind of deal?" Joey asked.

"If you can give me a couple months, then I'll let **you** pick the date that we tell everyone."

A genuine smile spread across Joey's face. "Really?" he asked, and Chandler nodded, smiling in return. "Maybe we could have a coming out party?"

Chandler nodded, trying to swallow the fear that climbed into his throat. "Sure."

He wished, more than anything, that he could be as excited as Joey was about telling everyone, but for him, coming out was a terrifying event to dread, not an event to celebrate.

He'd said 'give me a couple months', but honestly, he didn't see himself feeling any better about announcing his lifestyle change with the passing of time. He could only hope that when the time came, he could stand beside his friend and lover and admit to their relationship like a man, and not run like a mouse.

**TO BE CONTINUED**…

Please leave a review, and remember… "Lather, rinse, repea-eat. And lather, rinse, repea-eat. And lather, rinse, repea-eat… as needed."

MTLBYAKY


	9. 9

The One Where Chandler Finally Experiments

By: Jana~

**Chapter Nine**

*********

--"I don't know," Ross muttered, "It just seems weird."

"What does?" Monica asked as she remained on task, cutting and slicing raw vegetables.

"That Chandler and Joey are having this party," he answered. "It's no one's birthday. No one's engagement. No one's promotion. What exactly is the **reason for this party? And what's with all the secrecy?"**

Monica sighed, rolling her eyes. "You over think stuff too much. Some people don't have to have some, huge reason to have a party. Sometimes, you can want to throw a party just for the fun of it."

"Yeah, Ross," Phoebe agreed, stealing a carrot from the vegetable tray Monica was creating. "Stop being so squinky."

Groaning at the made-up word, he stated, "I'm not being **that**, or **anything**. I'm just, curious, is all."

"You're just paranoid," Rachel informed as she exited the bathroom, involving herself in the conversation. "Not everything is a conspiracy, Ross."

Irritated, he sighed, asking, "Am I the only one who thinks there is something weird going on here?"

"Yeah, pretty much," Monica muttered, and Rachel and Phoebe joined in with similar comments.

"Well, when the real reason for the party is announced, I'll be sure to tell you, I told you so!" he snipped, then huffed off to the bathroom.

**

--"I don't think my tie is straight," Joey complained, fidgeting with it as he entered the livingroom.

"Here, let me see," Chandler offered, moving to help. His hands were visibly shaking as he reworked the knot, fixing it. "There," he said, satisfied, but before he could turn away, Joey captured his face in his hands, pulling him into a kiss.

Chandler eased in, returning the affection, his hands firmly on Joey's hips, as he pulled closer.

"It's gonna be fine," Joey whispered softly in Chandler's ear, and he nodded slightly in response.

The sound of the door closing across the hall made Chandler jump, adrenalin raging. "What time is it?" His voice mirrored his wide-eyed and frantic expression.

"Chandler, relax," Joey soothed. "They're a few minutes early, but it's show time, ok?"

Nodding, Chandler took in a few deep breaths, welcoming the gentle kiss on his cheek from Joey before he moved to open the door for their friends.

"Hey, neat!" Phoebe exclaimed, "We didn't even knock yet!"

Joey laughed, inviting them all in. "Thanks for the veggie tray, Mon," he said as he held his hands out to take it. "Looks good."

"It's just vegetables," Ross stated, as if that was unclear. "Since when do vegetables look good to Joey Tribbiani?"

"Ever hear of being polite?" Monica hissed at her brother, then smiled back at Joey as she accepted the compliment.

Awkward silence followed, no one quite sure what to do or say next.

"You know what we should do first?" Phoebe announced, trying to help ease into the evening. "We should play 'Get Drunk Trivia'!"

"What's Get Drunk Trivia?" Ross asked, scowling.

"You're asked a question," Phoebe explained, "And if you **know** the answer, you drink a shot! First person to get five shots wins!"

"Oooh!" Rachel happily exclaimed, "That sounds like fun!"

"Yeah," Monica smiled, "I'm in."

"In," Joey and Chandler both said, almost in unison.

Ross rolled his eyes and sighed. "Ok, I guess I'm in, too."

"Yay!" Phoebe clapped excitedly, "This is gonna be **so** much fun! Chandler?" she asked as she turned to face him, "You still have that trivia gameboard?"

He knew Phoebe was up to something, he just wasn't sure what. "Yeah," he answered. "In my room. Wanna help me find it?"

Probably a bit more intensely than she should have, she announced, "Yeah! Let's go get it!" and led the way to his room.

--"Ok, Ms Buffay," Chandler whispered to his blonde friend, "You're up to something. What's going on?"

"Ross is being weird and tense, and squinky," she warned him.

"He suspects we're-?"

"No, no," she reassured him. "But he suspects **something**. I just figured, if we could get a few drinks in him, he'll stop being so-"

"Squinky?" Chandler interrupted, smiling.

A nod and a wink followed, then she gestured to the closet. "Get the game. And leave the questions to me."

*

--"Ok, Ross," Phoebe said as she held the question card in her hand, "You answer this question and you win the game."

Everyone, having caught on to what Phoebe was doing, shared knowing looks as they cheered Ross on.

"I'm on **fire!" Ross exclaimed, his words slurred slightly.**

Phoebe nodded and smiled, agreeing with him. "Ok, your question is, which came first, the Jurassic Period, or the Triassic Period?"

He scoffed, smiling smugly. "Of course, it was the Triassic Period that came first," he replied with confidence.

"That's right!" Phoebe announced, though she had no idea if it was or not, then reminded him, "You down this fifth shot, and you are the Get Drunk Trivia champion!"

She poured the shot for him, and he proudly lifted it to his lips, paused for a moment to ready himself, then shot it back. Shuddering first, he firmly set the glass down, raising his hands in triumph.

Humoring him, everyone applauded, stroking his ego, congratulating him.

"Well, since Ross is obviously **so** good at this game," Chandler announced as he stood from off the floor, "I say we all quit this game before we are, yet again humiliated by the master."

In agreement, they all got up off the floor, and Monica immediately went into clean mode, picking up the glasses and tequila bottle. Phoebe then jumped in to help, following Monica to the sink.

"And why are we getting Ross drunk?" Monica asked Phoebe in a whisper.

"The guys have something very important to share with us," she confided, "And Ross was being weird."

"**You ****know why they're having this party?" she asked, peeking to be sure no one was coming up on their backs.**

"I do," she confessed, "But I can't tell you," she immediately added, "So don't ask."

Before Monica could press further, Phoebe walked away.

Ross was drunk, no doubt about it, and as Rachel and Phoebe chatted quietly, Monica's eyes went to Chandler and Joey. Curiously, she watched as they stared at one-another, Chandler nodding, fidgeting, Joey seemingly calming him down with whispered words.

If she didn't know better, she would swear they were…

It was as if a lightning bolt had struck her, and she inaudibly gasped as she stepped back. She didn't know better. She didn't know anything.

Chandler glanced over, seeing the look on her face. She knew. Oh, God, she knew. 

Brushing his hand down Joey's arm, he whispered, 'hang on a sec', then headed straight for his confused friend.

"Are you ok?" he asked, careful to broach the subject cautiously.

"How long?" was all she said, and he nodded as he looked down at the ground.

"About eight months," he sighed, burying his hands in his pockets.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

She sounded hurt. He hadn't meant to hurt anyone. With a shrug, he whispered, "I don't know."

"Did you think I wouldn't understand?"

"No," he assured her. "I'm just- I was struggling, with who I was, what I wanted… I didn't want to jinx the relationship, by saying something too soon."

An expression came across her face that made him immediately wince. "This is why you turned me down in London!" she exclaimed in a whisper, and he nodded.

Then she did something he wasn't expecting. She smiled. "So," she said, "You **weren't lying to me!"**

Chandler smiled back, partly in relief. "I told you I wasn't lying to you. So," he asked, "You're not mad at me?"

"Well," she told him, "I'm hurt that you didn't tell me. I mean, I thought we could tell each other anything! But, I'm not mad. I'm happy for you guys!"

He touched her shoulder thoughtfully, then kissed her cheek. "That means a lot to me, Mon. To **us."**

Joey slowly approached, and Monica smiled at him as she lightly pinched his chin. "Make the announcement," she whispered, then dropped her hand and walked away.

"She guessed it," Chandler told him, and Joey nodded.

"Two down," Joey muttered. "Two to go." He discreetly cupped Chandler's ass cheek before heading for the center of the room; Chandler smirked as he followed.

"Ok, guys, there's a reason why we invited you here tonight…"

**TO BE CONTINUED**…

Please review! It can be, like, my Christmas present from you! What did I get you? …

12 drumming lessons with the 'Friend' of your choice

11 piping lessons with the 'Friend' of your choice

10 leaping lessons with the 'Friend' of your choice

9 dancing lessons with the 'Friend' of your choice

8 milking lessons with the 'Friend' of your choice (cow optional)

7 swimming lessons amongst swans, with the 'Friend' of your choice

6 laying lessons with the 'Friend' of your choice

5 golden rings, given to you by the 'Friend' of your choice

4 days at the Calling Birds Inn with the 'Friend' of your choice

3 French lessons with a hen, and the 'Friend' of your choice (I recommend Matthew Perry, since he speaks French)

2 turtle doves, perched atop the 'Friend' of your choice

1 'Friend' of your choice, and 1 member of the Partridge family, sitting in a pear tree

****Offer not valid outside your own imagination****

MTLBYAKY


	10. 10

The One Where Chandler Finally Experiments

By: Jana~

**Chapter Ten**

**********

--"Ok, guys," Joey announced, "There's a reason why we invited you here tonight."

"Ha!" Ross exclaimed. "I knew it!"

"Yeah, yeah," Monica mumbled, waving at him dismissively, then gestured for Joey to continue.

"There's something we've been keeping from- well, from all of you, pretty much, and, we think it's time we told you."

Looking around at his friends, he could see the knowing smile and encouragement from Phoebe, the understanding nod from Monica, the curious scowl from Rachel, and the drunken confusion from Ross.

"Chandler and I," he said after taking a deep breath, "Are **together**."

"Ha!" Ross exclaimed, his reaction directed towards the girls, but then he abruptly looked back at Chandler and Joey. "Huh?"

Joey smiled at Chandler before taking his hand, entwining their fingers together. "We're a couple. You know, boyfriend and boyfriend."

"They're gay, Ross," Phoebe added, a smirk on her face as she clarified.

"How can you be gay?" he asked. "You date women!"

"Not anymore," Joey countered. "That was fun," he explained, "But it wasn't what I truly wanted." He gave Chandler's hand a squeeze.

"And Chandler is what you want?" Rachel asked, her scowl still present.

"More than anything," Joey replied, then smiled back at Chandler. Reciprocating, Chandler then leaned in and kissed his lips softly.

"Oh my God!" Rachel squealed, "You guys are serious!" With a smile that was ear to ear, she hopped off the barstool and did a few extra hops of joy.

"Yeah, we're serious," Joey scoffed. "Did you think we were yanking you?"

"Well," Rachel countered in her defense, "It **is** Chandler, after all."

Smirking, Chandler's sarcasm flowed as he mumbled, "Yeah, thanks."

Rachel laughed, then rushed towards the couple. "Oh, I'm so happy for you guys!"

Monica and Phoebe immediately joined the huddle, similar excited comments tumbling over top of another.

Ross didn't move from his spot by the counter, watching the scene before him with a distant look in his eyes. Chandler was the first to notice, and gestured with his head towards him; they all turned to face him.

"Ross?" Monica spoke first, taking a step towards him. "Are you ok?"

"Why wouldn't I be ok?" he asked intensely, and quite a bit louder than the situation warranted. 

Joey and Chandler glanced at one another as Phoebe approached. "They're still the same people, Ross," she assured him. "This doesn't change who they are."

"I know that!" he exclaimed, it obvious to everyone that he was overcompensating. "I'm fine! Really! In fact, you know what we should do?" he announced with forced excitement. "We should go to a Karaoke bar and sing show tunes!"

Everyone shared looks, surprised and amused by Ross' drunken suggestion.

**END FLASHBACK**

--"Yeah, well, in my defense," Ross returned self righteously, "I wasn't trying to get drunk! You guys **got** me drunk!"

"We didn't force you to play the game," Phoebe reminded.

"That's right," Rachel chimed in, "You could have stopped playing at any time!"

Ross scoffed. "Are you kidding? I was **winning**!"

"At a fixed game!" Rachel shot back.

"Hey," Ross asked, "How did we get off the subject of Monica and London?"

"Oh good," Monica mumbled sarcastically, continuing to jot notes down in her spiral bound book, "I was hoping we would be revisiting that subject."

"Aww," Chandler cooed, "You know we love you, Mon." Leaning over, he gave her a friendly peck on the lips, and she smiled in response.

"I love you guys, too," she said as she handed Joey her notebook, accepting a quick kiss from him as well. "I have outlined three separate menu options, I need you guys to pick out the one you want for your reception."

Scanning over the list, Joey noticed, then whined, "There's no peanut butter fingers!"

"Joey, I told you," Monica scolded, "You can eat peanut butter off your fingers at home all you want. To your heart's content, but hun, I'm a chef, not a preschool lunchroom lady."

"Since this is your area of expertise," Chandler suggested to Monica, "And since you're doing this for us for free, why don't you pick."

"Well," she answered, "I like menu option one…"

As she rambled on, Chandler smiled, running his fingers through the hair at the nape of his fiancé's neck, glancing at all his friends.

Phoebe, smiling as she argued quietly with Ross about something he couldn't make out. Rachel, tuning the quarrel out as she flipped through the latest copy of Cosmo. Monica, passionately discussing her carefully thought out menus with Joey, trying to explain the word roulade.

How'd he get so lucky, to have all the pieces of his life fall right into place?

"What are you smiling about?" Monica asked, and all eyes found their way to him.

The smile dropped just slightly, before growing wider. "I'm just happy, is all."

***

--Fingers entwined, a thin top sheet sticking to their sweaty naked bodies, Chandler sighed contentedly.

"It's getting close," Joey broke the silence, shifting his position on the mattress slightly. "You nervous?"

"No," Chandler answered without hesitation. "You?"

With a slight shake of his head, Joey whispered, "No. But," he added, "I think I'm surprised **you're not."**

"To be honest, I am too. I thought, the closer it got to the date, the bigger the chance something would happen to freak me out. But nothing has." He smiled, giving Joey's hand a light squeeze.

"I'm glad," Joey admitted. "Oh," he suddenly remembered, "We didn't get an RSVP thingie from your dad. Is he coming?"

"No," Chandler answered shortly. "Mainly because I didn't invite him."

Joey unhooked his fingers from Chandler's, sitting up. "What? Why not?"

"I don't want him there, Joe. I don't want him in my life."

"What happened to the invitation I made out for him?"

With a shrug, Chandler admitted, "I threw it away."

"What is it with you and your dad, Chandler? What did he do that was **so wrong?"**

A deep sigh showed his irritation as he moved from the bed, grabbing his boxers off the floor and stepping hastily into them. "He abandoned his family, for one thing."

"He was probably just confused," Joey offered, following Chandler's lead and throwing his boxers on as he headed for the kitchen. "You remember how hard it was for **you, don't'cha?"**

"Yeah, it was hard for me, admitting it to myself. Coming out and all, but I didn't abandon my family!"

"That's cause you didn't **have** a family! Plus, your dad came out in the 70's! It was harder to do that then! It wasn't as accepted as it is now."

"That's no excuse, Joe," Chandler argued. "He didn't want me in his life, I don't want him at my wedding."

"Our wedding," Joey corrected. "And maybe **I** do!"

"Believe me, you don't want him there," Chandler insisted. "No one will be watching the ceremony! They'll all be looking at the man in the backless dress!"

Joey laughed, asking, "Do you honestly think he'll be the only cross-dresser there?" Chandler couldn't help but smile. "Seriously," Joey asked, "What's the harm if he comes?"

Shaking his head, Chandler said, "It doesn't matter now anyway. The wedding is less than 2 weeks away! I can't invite him **now**, this close to the date. He'll know I didn't want him there."

"So, call him and say that we didn't get his RSVP, and ask him if he's coming. Play it off like the invitation must've gotten lost in the mail." Joey promptly grabbed Chandler's address book from out of the endtable drawer, then handed it to him.

The thought of talking to the man made Chandler physically queasy, and he sat heavily on the barstool, his forehead resting on his arm, his arm resting on the counter. "I can't," he whispered.

Gently stroking his hair, Joey asked, "Do you want me to do it?" There was a moment's pause before Chandler slowly nodded, his head still down. "Does he go by Charles or Charlie or what?" Joey asked as he flipped the book open to 'B'.

Hesitating at first, Chandler finally said, "Helena."

"What?"

Chandler looked up at him, then repeated, "He goes by Helena."

"Why?"

"Cause the fact that he's a cross-dressing Vegas showgirl isn't embarrassing enough," he mumbled, dropping his head back down.

"What time is it in Vegas right now?"

Chandler looked at his watch, then answered, "A little after eight." As Joey grabbed the phone, the digital sounding tone indicating that he had clicked it on, Chandler hit his head three times in rapid succession on the counter before coming to rest on his arm once again.

"Um, hi," Joey said into the phone, "Is this Viva Las Gaygus? – Yeah, hi, I'm looking for Helena Bing…"

"Handbasket," Chandler corrected. "Helena Handbasket."

Joey laughed, then forced his voice to neutralize. "No, I'm sorry, um, actually, I'm looking for Helena Handbasket. – Yeah, this is regarding his- her, um, son, Chandler. - Yeah, I'll hold."

"Oh God, oh God, oh God…"

With authority, his hand over the mouthpiece of the phone, Joey snipped, "Chandler! Would you relax?" Startling, he removed his hand and brought his attention back to the phone call. "Yes, hello? Um, yeah, hi, Helena… - Oh, ok, Charles. Um, my name is Joey, and I'm a, well, **friend**, of Chandler's. – Yeah, no, he's fine, it's just, well, we sent you an invitation to our… wedding, and we didn't get an RSVP."

"Mine and Chandler's wedding. – Joey Tribbiani. – He didn't either. He didn't realize until a few years ago. – I hope he's happy," Joey said with a smile, rubbing his thumb along Chandler's finger, gaining his attention.

As Chandler slowly looked up, Joey said into the phone, "A week from this coming Saturday. The rehearsal dinner is on Friday. – Great! That's so great! – Yeah, let me get you the information!"

**TO BE CONTINUED**…

Please review! And remember… if someone calls you a 'huge crapweasel', it's **not** a compliment.

MTLBYAKY


	11. 11

The One Where Chandler Finally Experiments

By: Jana~

**Chapter Eleven**

***********

--Chandler's constant fidgeting was driving Joey nuts, but there was no getting him to sit down. He was too aware of what was about to take place. Of what the evening would bring.

Joey was nervous, too, but for all-together different reasons. This night symbolized the last night of being single. Sure, he'd been in a monogamous relationship with Chandler for three years, but this was a 'for life' commitment he was about to make. He was so sure it was what he wanted, but now on the eve of making it official, he was having doubts.

Doubts, not about his love for Chandler, but of his ability to make him happy. Though he kept his feelings well hidden, Joey had been plagued with worries for the better part of two weeks, replaying all the milestones in their relationship, in his head, a thousand times over.

Chandler had been so very reluctant to admit to himself that he was gay, and just as hesitant, if not more so, to admit it to their friends. Sometimes he felt as if he had somehow pressured Chandler into exploring and examining his sexual orientation, and couldn't help but wonder if, at some point, he would see it the same way and be angry with him for it.

The desire to keep him in his life prevented him from saying anything; opening the can of worms that could lead to the demise of the relationship, but he was starting to rethink the intelligence of that. If he kept his mouth shut **now, what was the possibility that down the line, Chandler would figure it out on his own and end it anyway?**

The expression he wore immediately clued Phoebe in that he was struggling with something.

"Hi, guys," she said breezily, giving them each a hug. "Why so intense?"

Chandler answered, assuming she was referring to him, unaware of the chaos raging within his fiancé's mind. "I haven't seen my dad in **years**! I guess I'm just a little nervous."

"Relax, Chandler," she soothed. "Your dad, more than anyone, will understand this."

"Yeah," he agreed absently, knowing there was no way he would be able to explain the anxiety he was feeling.

She watched as Joey rubbed Chandler's back in support, his look mirroring Chandler's, but obvious to Phoebe that the concern in his eyes was for different reasons.

"I need to borrow your hubby for a sec," she asked of Chandler, linking arms with Joey. "Is that ok?"

"Sure," he answered with ease, "Just don't have him gone too long. I need him right now."

Smiling, she assured him, "I won't. Breathe, ok?" she instructed. "In and out, slowly. Cleansing breaths. Your color is all off. You need to sage."

He scowled at her, confused. "I need to **what**?"

"Sage," she repeated. "You know, you need to calm down."

"That's not what sage means," he informed her, still scowling.

"It does to me," she replied with confidence. "In Aromatherapy, sage helps with calming and centering."

He couldn't argue with that, and he didn't want to… he had far too much on his mind. "Ok." The simple word was as much for acknowledging her as it was for dismissing her.

**

--"Ok, Joseph," Phoebe asked firmly, but kindly, and as a friend, "What's wrong?"

"What?" he asked, hiding behind a veil of confusion.

She gave him a sideways glance, letting him know she wasn't buying his act. "Out with it, Joseph Francis."

"Ugh," he groaned, "I hate it when you middle-name me."

"I know," she replied, "I'm using it now to show you how serious I am," she explained. "You shouldn't be this squinky right before your wedding."

"It's just… Chandler," he lied. "He's so stressed, and I don't know how to help him."

"That's not all though," she asked, placing her hand on his shoulder encouragingly, "Is it?"

"No," he admitted, glancing over at Chandler before continuing. "I'm worried."

She nodded, pleased that he was prepared to open up to her. "What about?"

"What if he decides, down the line, that I somehow pushed him into this? That it was because of **me** that he **turned gay? That I pressured him, and confused him?"**

"Joey," she sighed, "That's not going to happen. You didn't **turn Chandler gay. You can't **turn** someone gay."**

"I know that," he returned, "But, what if, because of me, he is diluting himself or something?"

Her smile couldn't be contained. "You mean, deluding himself?"

Blinking in confusion, he asked, "Isn't that what I said?"

"No," she told him. "What you said means to weaken the strength of. Deluding means to deceive, or, in the way you were trying to use it, to lie to himself."

"Yeah!" he exclaimed. "That's what I meant! What if, because of me, he only **thinks he's gay?"**

"I've seen the way he looks at you, hun. The way he acts around you. He's not lying to himself, about wanting to be with you. He loves you!"

Heavily sighing, his eyes wandered over to where Chandler stood. "I wish I could be so sure."

"If you are really **that** uncertain, you should talk to him."

"He's so stressed right now, cause of his dad coming, and because his dad and mom will be in the same room together for the first time in years. I can't add to that."

**

--"Nervous about tomorrow?" Ross asked Chandler as he approached, his third glass of champagne in hand.

"Among other things," Chandler muttered, still on the lookout for any sign of his parents.

"Trust me, it's easy. Just don't say the wrong name, and you're golden."

Chandler smirked, nodding in receipt of the advice. "I'll try and remember that."

"I want you to know," Ross said seriously, "That I'm really happy for you guys. I know I acted a little weird in the beginning," he added. "After you first told us, but it was just the shock of it, ya'know?"

It was the first time Ross had opened a dialog about his reaction. At the time, everyone thought it best to just leave him alone, and allow him time to deal on his own. As time went on, they all just fell into a comfortable denial about Ross' feelings, never pressing to discuss the matter, for fear of it causing more harm than good.

But now, he was broaching the subject, and Chandler momentarily forgot about the impending doom of his parents arriving as he, for the first time, asked the question he was dying to know the answer to.

"Why **did you freak, when we told you?"**

Ross sighed, knowing an explanation was long overdue. "I don't know," he admitted. "I guess I just wasn't expecting it. I mean, I feel that I'm an intelligent man, but, I did **not** see this coming. We were roommates in college! We've known Joey for years! How could I not see it?"

"So," Chandler asked, to be sure he understood correctly, "You reacted the way you did, because you felt stupid about not seeing it on your own?"

With a shrug, Ross muttered, "I guess. In a way."

"Man," Chandler smiled, "That is **so not** what I was expecting you to say."

His brow furrowed, Ross asked, "What were you expecting me to say?"

"I was expecting you to say that you were having problems dealing with this, because you had shared space and time with guys you **thought** were straight, and maybe you wouldn't have, had you known."

"No," he insisted, "I don't care about **that**. I was just, well, feeling stupid. You guys are my best friends. You were **together for eight-something months, and yet, I had no clue. It's like with Carol," he used as an example. "I had no **idea**, when she said, we need to talk, that she was going to tell me she was a lesbian, and in love with Susan. She'd gone out with Susan, supposedly innocently, for ****months, and I didn't see it coming?"**

"Well," Chandler offered, "Maybe your 'gaydar' is just, not as finely honed as other's are."

Ross laughed. "Yeah, I guess so."

**

--"Whatever it is they're talking about," Phoebe answered Joey's question, "It's helped Chandler relax. His color is **much** better."

"Uh-oh," Joey interjected, "I think **that's** about to change."

"Why?" Phoebe asked, and Joey gestured with his head in the general direction of the door.

"Cause, I think that's Chandler's dad."

**TO BE CONTINUED**…

Please review! And remember… "Playstation, is whack."

MTLBYAKY


	12. 12

The One Where Chandler Finally Experiments

By: Jana~

**Chapter Twelve**

************

--Chandler instantly tensed as the man walked into the room. Even though it had been years, he would know him anywhere.

Spotting him, Charles offered a smile as he approached. "Chandler," he said cordially as he extended his hand, feeling out the situation a little, and carefully, "You're looking… well."

The awkwardness between father and son was extreme, and all too noticeable.

"You, too," Chandler returned, unsure of what else to say. Hesitantly, he took his father's hand and shook it.

"And this must be Joey," Charles assumed, but Ross startled at the mistaken identity.

"No, no," he answered, "I'm his friend, Ross. **That's** Joey," he added as he pointed off in the distance.

*

"How do you know that's Chandler's dad?" Phoebe asked Joey, watching as the dapper-dressed older man stepped up to Chandler and extended his hand.

"I've seen pictures," Joey answered, then noticed Ross pointing at him. "Gotta go," he told her, moving quickly to Chandler's side.

"Mr. Bing?" he asked as he neared, smiling when Charles faced him and nodded. "Joey Tribbiani," he introduced himself, shaking the man's hand. "We spoke on the phone."

"It's a pleasure to meet you," Charles beamed, adding, "And please, hunny, call me dad."

Appreciative, Joey grinned. Not only did his soon-to-be father-in-law ask to be called 'dad', but the way in which he referred to him as 'hunny' indicated a sort of approval for the couple.

"How was your flight in?" Joey asked, trying to assist in easing the uncomfortable air.

"Oh, the flight itself was fine," Charles answered, "But the young boy sitting behind me, who kept kicking my seat and screaming 'are we there yet?', **he left a lot to be desired."**

The way Chandler just stared at his shoes, contributing nothing to the conversation brought a worried frown to Joey's expression. He had hoped that once in front of him, Chandler would be able to forgive his father, and maybe even begin to mend the relationship that had decades of decay from words never spoken. But instead, it looked as if he was pushing further away from any sort of reconciliation.

"Chandler and I would have picked you up from the airport," Joey mentioned, fairly certain that Charles was aware of his son's growing distance.

"You gents had far too much going on, to worry about picking up this old queen and her excessive luggage. Besides," he added, "I put a call in to a few friends, and they were happy to do it."

Awkward silence fell over them, bringing with it the desire to flee. He knew they were looking to him to do something… **say** something, but he just didn't know what to say to the man that abandoned his family so many years ago. That left him wondering who he was as a child, and how to cope with recent discoveries now, as an adult.

At a loss for what else to say, avoidance of the obvious issue no longer seemingly possible, Joey nudged Chandler. "Say something."

"I don't know what to say, ok?" Chandler shot back. "I mean, what do I say in a situation like this? Glad you could make it to at least **one** of the important moments of my life? **Really** long time, no see? The last twenty years has treated you well?"

He was very aware of his father's fidgeting, uncomfortable over the scene he was creating.

"I'm sorry, ok?" Chandler asked forgiveness. "I thought I would be ok with this, but as it turns out, I'm not." With a sharp crisp movement, he spun around and walked away.

"I'm sorry," Joey apologized to Charles. "I think I might've pushed him into this. He seemed ok with it though, when I made the call."

"Maybe you should go after him," Ross suggested to Joey, clearing his throat uneasily.

"Let me." Charles made the request, placing his hand gently on Joey's arm before walking after his son.

"I really F-ed up, didn't I?" Joey muttered, but Ross shook his head.

"The timing might not be the best, but Chandler needs to deal with this sooner or later. And later, he'd be kicking himself if his dad **wasn't** here to see his son get married."

His hand slid roughly across his face, his eyes closed in momentary consideration. "I just thought it'd be nice to have **one** of our dad's here."

"Your dad still angry?" Ross asked.

"Like a hippo with a hernia," Joey replied, a touch of sadness to his voice. "Ma said she was coming, and all my sisters but Cookie said they'd be here, but not without hearing an earful from Dad about it first. I don't think he's ever going to accept this," he added with a sigh, and Ross gave him a pat of sympathy. "Chandler's dad is here, but Chandler doesn't want him here, and my dad won't come, and I **do** want him here. That's irony or something, right?"

"Yeah," Ross whispered, giving Joey another pat on his back. "That's a perfect example of irony."

**

--The kitchen area was hopping with waiters, all briskly following orders from Monica, who had long since gone into drill sergeant mode.

"I don't know if this is **worth** $10 per hour," Chandler heard one of the waiters whisper, and he cracked a smile.

"Mon," Chandler said kindly, with a good-natured lilt to his voice. "You might want to take it easy on the help, or you're liable to have a mutiny."

"What are you doing in here?" she asked, moving past his comments without pause. "You should be out there with Joey, greeting guests!"

Chandler snagged a tiny hors d'oeuvre off a passing platter, popping it into his mouth as he shrugged his answer. "My dad showed up."

Monica's hurried air about her dissipated near immediately as she stared back at her friend.

"Wanna talk about it?"

Shrugging again, as if he was unsure, he moved on anyway and opened up to her. "I don't know what I was thinking, giving in to Joe like that. I mean, **he wanted this way more than I did. I just figured, I could fake my way through it or something, ya'know? For his sake. To make up for the fact that **his** dad refuses to accept us. I don't know," he added with a heavy sigh. "Does that make me a horrible son?"**

"No," she assured him, her arm snaking around his waist, snuggling into his side in a consoling manner. "It makes you human. And it shows how much you love Joey."

He took comfort in his friend's compassion, wrapping his arm around her shoulder and pulling her tight to him. "So," he asked, "What do **you** think I should do?"

"I think you should talk to him," she advised, holding her hand up to stop an approaching waiter; the man rolled his eyes and walked away.

"Which 'him'?" Chandler asked. "Him, Joey, or him, my dad?"

"Both," she answered, pulling back to look him in the eye. "Bottom line, this is **your day, too. And if having your dad here is **so** upsetting to you, then he shouldn't be here. Joey will understand that," she added sincerely.**

"So, you think I should tell my dad to leave?"

"Before you do…" The sound of his father's voice caused Chandler to whip around, Monica following the motion a second later. "Could I maybe have a few minutes of your time?"

Chandler stared back at his father, taking in a deep shaky breath before finally nodding.

**TO BE CONTINUED**…

Sorry about the delay in getting this chapter out. I have been **very** sick, and dealing with injuries due to a nasty fall. I haven't forgotten about my stories, never fear, it just might take a little while to get caught up, is all.

Also, sorry if there are any grammatical errors in this chapter… I have reread it several times, checking for mistakes, but it is sometimes hard to catch the errors when you're in such a hurry to post the update. Know what I mean? It's like, you read it so many times, you almost look **past** the words you're reading.

Anyway…

Please leave a review, and MTLBYAKY


	13. 13

The One Where Chandler Finally Experiments

By: Jana~

**Chapter Thirteen**

*************

--His dad waited till the door clicked closed before facing him, a heavy sigh escaping as he began. "I know me being here is making you uncomfortable, so if you want me to leave, I will. Certainly. But, I want you to know something. I have always been proud of you, and my absence in your life wasn't for selfish or malicious reasons."

"Nora said my announcement upset you so badly," he continued, "That it would be better if I left you alone for a while. A while turned into months, which eventually turned into years, and every time I asked to see you, she would turn down my request. Once you turned 18, and the choice was yours legally, she had already cemented the idea in your head that I didn't want to be apart of your life. Which, believe me Chandler, wasn't true."

"So, you're trying to tell me that it was because of Mom, that you never wrote to me? That you never sent one single Birthday card, or Christmas gift?" Chandler noticed the shocked expression on his father's face, and in a split second, he realized the man before him wasn't the bad guy after all.

"I sent you a birthday card every year, with money in it so you could buy yourself any gift you wanted! I sent you several Christmas presents, every year without fail! I even sent you a graduation present!"

"You did." It was a statement, rather than a question, and his father nodded. "What?"

"A watch," Charles answered. "A very expensive gold watch."

Chandler stood stunned, his eyes darting about, confused, angry, hurt. All his life, he was so certain he knew the score. Now, he felt like he didn't know anything.

"Chandler?" Joey's voice brought him out of his thoughts and into the present. "Your mom is here."

His eyes flashed as he briefly glanced at his father, then, without waiting to cool down first, he marched out to greet his mother, armed with the new revelation.

*

--"Chandler, darling," Nora oozed with her typical icky-sweet tone, "How are you?" It wasn't till he was closer that she realized he seemed upset. "What's wrong, dear?"

"Why?" The question was simple, but his harsh tone told her something huge was brewing in his mind.

"Why, what?"

Though she seemed confused, Chandler had a feeling she knew what he was talking about.

"Why," he asked pointedly, "Did you lie to me, all my life? Why did you take away any chance I had at a relationship with my father?"

It was then that Nora looked past her son and saw her ex-husband, watching the scene unfold from a distance. "Honey," she spoke anxiously, "I don't know what that man has told you, but I never once lied to you."

The raised voices created onlookers, his friends and fiancé included, as he confronted his mother, but the spectacle he was causing mattered not at all to him in that moment.

"Really?" he spat. "So, you didn't keep Birthday cards and Christmas presents from me? You didn't keep a gold watch that was sent to me as a graduation gift? You didn't tell **my father to 'leave me alone'?"**

"It's- it's complicated, ok?" she stammered, looking around at all the curious dinner guests. "Look," she asked in a whisper, "Why don't we go somewhere and talk in private-"

"No!" he exclaimed. "I'm done talking with you! I want you to leave!"

Indignant, she asked, "Why are you believing **him** over your own mother?"

"Because," he answered with gritted teeth, "**He** is my father, and I don't know him at all. And **that**, is because of **you."**

"Honey," she returned, her tone much sweeter, "He's lying to you! Can't you **see that?"**

"Where did you get that gold watch you gave to Mr. Easton?" he asked suddenly, and her eyes slowly grew wider. "You remember, right?" he continued. "It was during my graduation dinner, and it was a joint celebration with that guy you were dating, because he got some promotion or something. Where did you get the gold watch you gave to him?" he asked again.

Obviously flustered, she struggled to answer, finally announcing, "I don't remember. Some jewelry store- I-"

"Oh, Nora," Charles sighed. "You gave our son's gift to some gigolo?"

"He was **not a gigolo!" she shot back. "And I didn't give him **my** son's gift! I gave him a gift **I** bought for him!"**

"How much did it cost?" Chandler pressed, and she seemed all the more flustered at the further inquiry.

"I don't remember," she told him. "It was a long time ago!"

Chandler turned towards his father. "How much did the watch cost?"

Without a moment's hesitation, Charles answered, "Two thousand six hundred dollars, marked down from three-five."

"Describe it," Chandler demanded, snapping his fingers at his mother when she tried to speak up. "There was something very unique about it, as I remember."

"The watch was 18k gold, with a gold band," his father recalled. "And it had no numbers on it," he added. "The face had only diamonds and the watch hands."

Turning back to face his mother, Chandler glared hard at her, almost defying her to lie to him again.

"Coincidence," she muttered, smiling uneasily.

"Did you give away **everything** he ever sent me?!"

"No!" she insisted. "You got everything but the watch, I swear! I just, didn't tell you it was from him."

"Why?!" Chandler demanded to know.

"Because," she blurted out, "I didn't want his **way** to rub off on you!"

Jaw set, he asked, "And what **way** would that **be exactly, ****Mother?"**

"Yes, Nora," Charles chimed in, "What **way** are you referring to?"

Angrily, she announced, "I didn't want him to influence your sexual orientation, ok?!"

Everyone in the room gasped, and Chandler expression grew ever harder. "Well, surprise, **Mother, I'm gay! And since you ****kept my father ****from me, you can't very well blame him for it, can you?!"**

"Sweetie," she said pleadingly, "Don't misunderstand! I'm ok with you being gay, I just didn't want you thinking you **had** to be to please your father! I didn't want him convincing you to be gay!"

"How would receiving Christmas and Birthday gifts once a year convince me to be gay?" Chandler questioned, revealing the ridiculousness of her statement.

"And, you know, Nora," Charles chimed in, "Contrary to popular belief, we, the gay men of the world, don't go around trying to **convert** heterosexuals."

Nora glared at her ex-husband before spouting, "Haven't you done enough damage, **Charles?!"**

Putting his hands on his hips in dramatic fashion, he shot back, "Haven't **you?!"**

With a huff of exasperation, she turned away from Charles and faced her son. "What is it going to be, Chandler? Are you going to choose this man, who abandoned you and has lied to you? Or will you choose me, your mother, who has always been there for you?"

"First of all," Chandler replied, "You have been 'there for me' almost not at all. Nannies have been there for me. Servants, school administrators and counselors have been there for me, but **you**, not so much. Second of all, he didn't abandon me, you pushed him away and kept him from me! And, I'm sorry, but Mother, I think it is **you** who has lied to me. All these years. And what's amazing is, not only are you refusing to own up to it, but you don't even seem the slightest bit remorseful!"

"Why should I be remorseful about something I haven't done?!"

He sighed, shaking his head. "Goodbye, Mother."

Incensed, she growled softly before turning on her heel and marching out the door.

Joey slowly approached as the room remained deathly silent, and placed his hand gently on Chandler's shoulder. "Are you ok?" he asked softly, and Chandler placed his hand on Joey's as he nodded slightly.

"I will be," he answered, then turned to face his father. "I think I owe you an apology," he almost whispered, but Charles just shook his head.

"This isn't your fault, it's Nora's," he told his son. "I'm just sorry it all had to come to a head **now**, on the eve of your wedding."

"Me too," Chandler agreed, "But, I **am** glad that it happened. I may not have ever known the truth, if you hadn't come here today. Whatever you told me, I might have continued to believe it was lies. Now, I know the truth."

With a slight hesitation, he stepped towards his dad, offering a small smile as he wrapped his arms around him. 

"I guess we have some catching up to do," Charles whispered, and Chandler nodded against his shoulder.

"I guess we do."

**TO BE CONTINUED**…

I'm thinking, one more chapter oughta do it. Sorry about the delay in getting this and chapters of other stories out… things have been hectic in Jana's World. Hopefully, I'm back in the swing of things, and will be able to update semi-often, like before.

Ok, so, my happiness depends on you all, to review and let me know what you think. So, please, make me happy.

MTLBYAKY


	14. 14

The One Where Chandler Finally Experiments

By: Jana~

**Chapter Fourteen**

**************

--Joey paced the small room, too much alone time lending to his current state of panic. Rachel told him he couldn't see Chandler before the ceremony. That it was bad luck. If not for **that**, he would've been out the door in search of him long ago.

Unable to stand it any longer, Joey grabbed the doorknob and turned, marching out into the hall, only to run, literally, into Rachel.

"Where are you going?" she asked. "What's wrong?"

"I have to talk to Chandler," Joey told her, his tone of voice showing the urgency he felt.

"Ok, slow down," Rachel advised him, steering him back towards his room. "What's the problem? Why do you look like you're ready to explode?"

"It's just," he said frantically, "What if this is a mistake, huh? What if later, it all goes to hell? What if-?"

"Joey, calm down," Rachel instructed, cutting in. "It's normal to get cold feet," she reasoned with him. "That's all this is, ok? You love Chandler! You **want to do this!"**

Joey almost seemed confused for a moment, before telling her, "I know **I do, it's Chandler I'm worried about!"**

It took a second or two, but Rachel caught on. "Oh, I get it!" she exclaimed. "You're worried about whether or not **Chandler** has changed his mind!"

"Yeah! I mean, he was **so** reluctant, admitting he was gay!" he announced as he started pacing again. "**So reluctant to tell everyone! What if later, he changes his mind? What if while up at the altar, he says he can't go through with it?"**

"Honey," she said, trying to reassure him, "He's not going to do that. He loves you! And," she added, "I just saw him ten minutes ago! He's not looking to run!"

"How do you know?" he challenged her. "Did he **say** that? Did you **ask** him?"

"Well, no," she admitted, "But, I ran out on my wedding, remember? I know what wanting to run looks like, and he doesn't look anything like that. I mean, he looks **nervous, but-"**

"Oh, man," Joey interrupted anxiously. "I gotta talk to him, Rach, ok? I gotta know!"

"Ok, ok, Joe, settle," she told him firmly, stopping him from taking another nervous lap around the room. "I'll go see what we can work out, alright? You stay here and wait for one of us to come get you."

"Ok," he agreed. "Thanks."

She smiled, hugging him supportively. "You're welcome. Just, sit tight for now, and stop thinking so much!" she added with a laugh.

***

--Spotting him, she headed for him like a woman on a mission, and as she approached, the smile he had plastered on his face faded as he noticed the serious expression she wore.

"I need your help," Rachel told Ross, pulling him slightly aside.

"Why?" he asked, concerned. "What's going on?"

"It's Joey," she informed him. "He's freaking out."

"Joey?" Ross asked, surprised. "I would've thought Chandler faster than Joey-"

"Yeah, well, it's not what you think," she explained. "He's actually freaking out about whether or not **Chandler** is freaking out."

Ross rolled his eyes, asking, "Well, did you tell him that Chandler is fine?"

"Yes," Rachel semi-snipped back. "It didn't help. He wants to talk to Chandler."

"Isn't there a whole, bad luck to see the groom before the ceremony thing?"

"Yes," she answered, starting to walk away, Ross following along. "Seeing is bad, but **talking… there's no rule against that."**

"Ok, so, what's the plan?"

"Well, off the top of my head," she said as she continued for a destination unknown by Ross, "I'm thinking either phones, or a hanging sheet of some kind, separating them."

***

--Rachel grumbled as she hurried down the hall, mumbling, "No one will lend me their stupid cell phone! Stupid, distrusting, rude, insensitive-" She stopped her near-whispered rant as she knocked on Chandler's door.

He smiled at her as he opened the door, but was immediately aware that she did not look happy. "What's up?" he asked, a frown replacing his smile.

"Everything is fine," she assured him before telling him, "But something **is** up."

"What is it?" he asked, gesturing for her to come in.

"Joey is a little bit freaking out," she told him, but before she could further explain, he interrupted.

"What? Why? Why is he freaking out? Has he changed his mind?"

She could hear the panic rising in his voice. "No!" she exclaimed. "That's not it at all!"

"Then," he asked, calmer, "What is it?"

"He thinks **you might be rethinking this decision."**

Chandler sighed. "Why would he think that?"

"I think I'll let **him explain all that," she answered. "Ross is bringing him here now. He insisted on talking with you."**

"I thought we weren't supposed to see each other before the ceremony?"

"You're **not supposed to ****see each other," she said with a smirk. "There's no rule against ****talking with one another beforehand."**

Just then there was a knock at the door. "Ok," she instructed, "Turn around and face away from the door." Chandler did what she asked of him. "Now, you **can't turn around, ok?"**

"Ok," he agreed, listening as she moved away and opened the door.

Ross stood with Joey, Joey's back to the door, Ross guiding him slowly into the room. As soon as Chandler and Joey stood inches apart, back to back, Rachel reminded them, "No turning around guys! Promise!"

"We promise," they both said in perfect unison, and Rachel nodded triumphantly as she stepped away.

"What's going on, Joe?" Chandler asked, his tone of voice soft and soothing.

"I just," Joey answered, hesitating, "I just need to know that this is what you **really want. That you don't feel pressured into this at all…"**

"I **do really want to do this, Joe," Chandler told him sincerely. "And how exactly would you be pressuring me?"**

"Because, I, sorta talked you into the whole, experimenting thing in the first place. And I was the one that insisted we come out to everyone! And I'm the one that proposed to **you**!"

"And I said yes, Joe!"

"But, did you just say yes cause I proposed in the restaurant, in front of all those people? Like, you didn't want to embarrass me by saying no, so, you just said yes?"

"Um, **no! ****Joe! I said yes because I **want** to marry you! If I'd said yes just to spare you embarrassment in front of a room full of strangers, I sure would've said something ****long before **now**!"**

"Really?" Joey asked, sounding hopeful. "So, you really want to marry me?"

"Joey," he sighed, shaking his head, "Of **course** I want to marry you! I **love** you!"

Ross and Rachel smiled at one another as they remained quietly out of it.

Relieved, Joey exhaled sharply. "I love you, too," he returned. "And I'm sorry for being all weird," he apologized. "Nerves got the better of me."

Chandler backed up a few steps, till his back touched Joey's, then reached for his hand. As fingers laced together, he whispered, "Well, I want to forgive you, but, I just may need some convincing. Tonight, when we're alone. Get my meaning?" He smiled when Joey leaned his head back, to rest on Chandler's.

"Oh, I'm **so gonna convince you to forgive me tonight-"**

"Ok!" Rachel quickly interrupted, "All is good now, so, let's get this wedding underway!"

**TO BE CONTINUED**…

Ok, so, I lied. There will be one more chapter after this one. Still wanting reviews on this story (and on all my stories, if I'm being honest), so, please be so very kind as to leave feedback.

Thanks so much, and MTLBYAKY


	15. 15

The One Where Chandler Finally Experiments

By: Jana~

**Quick Author's Note**:

I'll have my regular Author's Note at the end of the chapter, I just wanted to say this real quick, before you all begin reading…

The flashback section of this chapter is closer to rated **'R'** than **'PG-13'**, so if rated **'R'** sexual content offends you, you might want to skip over that part. You will still be able to follow the story if you do, I just put in the flashback section to **hopefully** please those who requested 'more action'.

***************

**Chapter Fifteen**

***************

--Rachel proved to be just as good at wedding planning as she was at fashion. The hall looked amazing, carefully sidestepping too many feminine touches, with just the right amount of flowers and candles to give a romantic feel without being excessive.

Unlike a typical wedding format, there were two aisles, starting at opposite sides of the room, meeting when closer to the altar, with the wedding guests seated in the middle of them. It was Rachel's suggestion, an answer to the concerns Chandler and Joey both had about being perceived as the 'bride'. They both loved her idea, and agreed to it readily. That's when she became their wedding coordinator.

Monica was the caterer, but there was never even a question about that. Before they could even fully ask her to be, she was excitedly hugging them, offering her services free of charge, rattling off menu ideas.

Ross was the best man, for both of them. Originally, they thought they would each have a best man, but since they both wanted Ross, they ultimately decided to just have one best man for both grooms. He was in charge of throwing them a bachelor party, holding onto the rings, and the vows they had written for one-another.

Phoebe, because she 'called it' first, was to perform the ceremony for them. Getting ordained on the internet, she was the one that did all the research, finding the perfect words to use, to join her close friends together for life.

Cue the music, and the whole ceremony was set into motion, the guests standing as the two men entered the room and headed down their separate paths, to the one that joined them together, both literally and ceremonially.

***

--Rachel dropped onto the rented chair, offering a tired smile to Phoebe and Monica as she sighed heavily. "I don't think I'll be able to move again for a week." Her two friends groaned in agreement.

The last of the guests had meandered out the door long before, leaving only the grooms' closest friends, and a crew of a couple dozen for cleanup, all dragging wearily due to the long day.

"Just said goodbye to Chandler's mom," Ross said as he neared the table his sister and friends were seated at. "Guess she figured, because of that kiss we shared a few years back, that I would be her best bet for understanding her position."

"What did you tell her?" Monica asked curiously.

"I just told her that it wasn't up to me to exonerate her of any wrong doing she may or may not have been involved in, and that she should wait a few weeks at least before trying to talk to Chandler."

"Did you see her peeking in at the back of the hall during the service?" Phoebe asked, and everyone nodded. "I don't think Chandler saw her though."

"Joey did," Rachel informed. "When we were dancing, he told me he saw her. Don't think he plans on telling Chandler though. At least, not right away."

"They looked so cute, didn't they?" Monica asked, smiling at the memory of her two friends standing up at the altar together.

"Chandler looked nervous," Ross commented.

"He wasn't," Monica said in his defense. "He was emotional," she added with a smile.

"You know," Phoebe changed the subject, "All things considered, I think today was a smashing success."

Rachel made a humming sound as she lowered the champagne glass from her lips, before holding it up in a toast. "To a flawless wedding."

Phoebe and Monica raised their glasses in agreement, followed by Ross a second later. 

"And to Chandler and Joey," Monica added, "May their honeymoon be as perfect!"

***

--The bellhop keyed into and entered the room ahead of them, pushing the cart that contained their luggage. "Where would you like these, sir?"

The question was directed at Chandler, so he pointed to the bed in response, watching as Joey moved to the window, pulling the drapes.

"Awesome view," he announced appreciatively. "Come check this out, Chandler."

Smiling as he approached, he put his hand on Joey's shoulder as he peered over it, looking out at the ocean that seemed to catch the man's complete attention.

They were only remotely aware that the bellhop was rambling on about amenities and room service, nothing but the man standing beside of importance to them in that moment. Only after the bellhop cleared his throat loudly, his hand out and in search of a tip, did the two men snap back into the present.

"Yes, thank you," Chandler told the man, pressing a $5 bill into his hand, cueing him to leave.

Joey's gaze remained out the window, his back to him, and Chandler sighed softly before stepping up behind him. Not wanting to startle him, he inched his hands slowly onto Joey's hips, pulling closer before snaking his arms around him.

"Have you ever seen such a shade of blue?" he asked, kissing Joey's shoulder affectionately.

Joey turned slightly in his arms to face him, smiling. "Every time I look into your eyes."

With a grin to match, Chandler grabbed hold of Joey's hips, bringing him around fully.

"I'm still in need of that convincing we talked about earlier," he whispered against Joey's lips, teasing him, causing him to shudder; Chandler smiled at his reaction.

Inching closer, Chandler pressed his body into Joey's, kisses trailing down his neck, from just behind his ear to his shoulder, eliciting soft moans from him.

"Do you remember the first time we did this?" Joey asked, and Chandler hummed an affirmative response as he nibbled on fragrant skin.

"How could I forget?" he answered. "I've never been so aroused and frightened, all at the same time, **ever**."

Gently, Joey pushed away, initiating eye contact. "You said something, when we were, you know, **together**. I'm not sure if you meant to say it out loud, cause you whispered it, like you were saying it when you only meant to think it."

Curious, and a little confused, Chandler asked, "Well, what did I say?"

*

**FLASHBACK**

*

--"My room or yours?" Joey asked, the time seeming right, Chandler seeming ready.

"Yours," Chandler answered simply, standing at Joey's prompt… his legs felt like they would collapse out from under him, he was shaking so hard. Sensing this, Joey took Chandler's hand and slowly led the way to his room, sliding up behind him to close the door once inside.

He stared back at Chandler for a moment, casually leaning against the closed door, before finally asking, "What are you so scared about?"

"I don't know," Chandler answered, turning to take a seat on the edge of Joey's bed. Folding his hands, his elbows resting on his knees as he leaned forward, he added, "The unknown, maybe?"

Nodding his understanding, Joey approached the bed, kneeling at the foot of it, resting his hand on Chandler's thigh. "We're gonna take this nice and slow, ok? Some kissing, some touching… you don't even have to get fully undressed, if you don't want to."

Sighing first, Chandler said, "Maybe if we just climb into bed, and- and just, you know, go from there?"

Chandler watched as Joey stood, as he slowly removed his faded black T-shirt, tossing it to the floor before moving around to the side of the bed. After pulling the dryer-wrinkled blanket down and out of the way, Joey climbed in, studying the back of Chandler's head.

"Change your mind?" he asked, and Chandler turned his position to better face him.

"No," he told him, sounding less sure than he meant to. "Just, thinking, is all."

"You do that too much," Joey returned, then patted the mattress beside him. "This was your idea, remember?" he reminded. "Just, come lay down, and, you know what, **you** can lead, ok?"

He turned away as he stood, slowly undoing the buttons on his shirt; he couldn't stop the smile that spread across his face as Joey starting humming music that was reminiscent of something heard in porno movies, or during a striptease.

When his casual dress shirt hit the floor, Chandler moved to climb in beside Joey, his white t-shirt still on. Stiffly, on his back, he stared up at the ceiling, unmoving, silent.

"Your move," Joey whispered after a few moments, turning on his side and resting his head on his hand as his elbow dug into his pillow.

"Ya'know," Chandler whispered back, finally blinking, "Maybe **you** should lead."

With a smirk of a smile, Joey said, "I can do that," then slowly began inching his fingers under Chandler's shirt.

Eyes drifting closed, Chandler sighed at the gentle touch, relaxing as the soft caresses continued.

Soon, lips brushed against his, and Chandler welcomed the sensation, his hand reaching out, winding into the hair at the nape of Joey's neck and urging him closer.

Grabbing the hem of Chandler's t-shirt, Joey pulled it up and over, their kiss breaking as the warm article of clothing came between them. Instead of returning his lips to Chandler's, Joey moved to his neck, kissing lower, to his chest, following the soft patch of hair down to his navel.

"You ready to kick this up a notch?" Joey asked, his eyes searching Chandler's as he craned to see him. He nodded, resting his head back onto the pillows, and Joey smiled.

Unmistakable sounds of his belt being undone hit Chandler's ears, and he swallowed hard, assisting in small ways as Joey struggled to pull his pants down and off. His boxers slipped down his waist just a little, but otherwise remained in place, which was just what Joey wanted, as he was still attempting to go slow.

Sliding back in beside him, Joey grazed Chandler's thigh, the silk material of his boxers moving with his hand as he pushed higher up his leg.

Almost inaudibly, Joey heard Chandler breathe, "Finally."

*

**END FLASHBACK**

*

--"I **said** that? I said, 'finally'?" Chandler asked, surprised, and Joey nodded.

"So, you didn't mean to **say** it," Joey surmised, and Chandler sighed in response, moving away and taking a seat at the edge of the bed. Sensing it, Joey asked, "What's wrong?"

"I can't believe I'm about to admit this," Chandler mumbled, just loud and distinct enough for Joey to hear, without committing to the declaration. After a moment, he confessed, "I wasn't 100% honest with you, Joe."

Anxious, Joey asked, "About what?"

"When you first moved in- **shortly** after you first moved in, I sorta had… **dreams**, about you and I, **together**. I **assumed** you were straight, and I was absolutely convinced **I** was straight, so I never said anything about them, and tried to push them out of my head as best as I could."

"Briefly," he continued, "I wondered what it might be like, to **be** with you…"

"So, when I suggested we, **experiment**, you weren't as freaked out as you seemed to be?"

"Oh, no, I was **totally** freaked out. Bordering on losing my mind, but some of the reasons **why** I was freaked, I left out of the many conversations we'd had about it all. After time, I figured it didn't matter. We were together, so the fact that **before** we were, I'd had dreams about us, didn't seem all that important."

"So, when you said 'finally'…" Joey asked, trailing off to allow Chandler to fill in the blank.

"I apparently said out loud, what I was thinking. Which was that, **finally**, those dreams from so long ago were becoming reality."

"Wow," Joey sighed. "I think if it's possible, I love you even more."

"Really?" Chandler asked, somewhat amazed by the statement, and Joey nodded as he took a seat beside him on the bed. "You're not upset, that I kept that from you, for all these years?"

Joey shook his head. "No, I'm not upset. Sure, it woulda been cool if you had told me, but it doesn't change things **now**."

"So," Chandler purred, "I guess I need to convince you **too**, to forgive me."

"After **I** convince **you**," Joey returned as he deftly worked the buckle on Chandler's pants.

Reclining slightly, his elbows digging into the mattress as Joey undid his snap and zipper, he whispered, "Finally."

*****

THE END 

*****

Ok, so, that's the end! When I started writing this story, I had only intended to see it through to where Chandler 'finally experiments' after struggling with what his feelings were, but it evolved into so much more. This chapter was absolute torture to write, and before you get upset about that comment, let me explain. 

I started, stopped, deleted, and started again a couple dozen times, but struggled each time with the content. It either seemed too rushed, or too cheesy, or too stupid. Writing slash romance is **hard**, for **me** anyway, and every time I tried, one of them would seem too feminine, or just plain out of character.

I sincerely hope that this final chapter is 'up to par', so to speak. Thanks for suffering through my first and probably last attempt at slash.

Oh, and Cress, just so you know, I had the idea already in outline that Phoebe would be the one to marry them, before you posted your review. You must've read my mind! :)

Ok, so, **please**, even though this story is done, can you take just a sec and leave a review? I would be most appreciative.

Thanks for reading, and MTLBYAKY


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